A couple of days ago i was able to talk to a friend about what i had been going through for the last couple of months i told my friend how for the past few months that i had a started to look at guys in a whole new way. she was able to help me out and guide me as to what to do. And now i really do not care if someone were to find out about me but i just don't know if my parents will accept it or
I did it. I came out to my mum.
Oh my god, I feel so...I don't even know, I'm a bit drunk. Well, quite drunk. But like, I don't feel much different. But now I feel like I could come out to the entire world.
She was totally accepting. We discussed how a couple of years back she said she would be disappointed, and she explained she didn't mean she would be disappointed in me, but rather, she would be disappointed FOR me that I couldn't have children, that people would prejudice me and that I wouldn't experience some of the wonderful experiences that she's felt.
Okay, about two entries ago I was talking about this bisexual guy that has a crush on me (I inferred from his actions and speeches which was rather obvious that he did) but I don't like him the same way. I was planning on telling me last Friday at youthgroup but I went to see a drama production instead. I was planning to tell him on the phone some time when nobody was home but everyone was home for the whole week. I was planning to tell him maybe this Friday at youthgroup but Nick invited me to go bowling. Blah, so heck... today when he was on MSN saying all this stuff to me agen I felt really uncomfortable and I decided I can't wait anymore. I made sure he was there, and then confirmed whether he liked me more than a friend. Then I made it clear to him that I only like him as a friend. He was silent for a long while and then said he understood (in a rather depressing way). I'm glad I made my point across.
I tend to write in journals online when I have some problem I need to get out. You know just so it won't build up too much since there's no one I can really talk to about certain things. When things are good though, I usually fall off the face of the internet planet. I'm immersed in life and I live it up like a cheap hooker on the 1st and 15th of every month. Who wouldn't? Things are good right now. So here's my positive post. I usually don't say it because it jinx's it, but they are. I haven't felt like complete shit in the past couple of weeks and I'm happy because of it. I'll take any form of happiness. :P
I came out to my first person yesterday, whoo! We just went to a pub for lunch, and she's like bisexual and she already kind of knew, but I actually came out and properly said it. And so then she was all like "Oh my god I have to take you to London to go to Soho." And I was like, "Well let's just do it now." So we did :)
Went to London around..oh I dunno, 8.30pm (I live only 20 mins by train). Then we went to Camden first of all, for like a couple of drinks in just normal straight bars, just had a funny time, people watching and stuff. And then we went over to Soho, went to The Village, which was just so nice, first time in a gay club and it was just like, OH MY GOD men kissing and being together. The world should be like that, seriously. You can just be yourself and nobody judges you or looks at you funny, that's what I love about London.
I was going to make a rant, but then I realized I can't think of enough to say/ have too much to say, so you guys can help me with it! There are ALOT of depressed people around. There are like, 8 different sub-categories of depression! It's not right! I am so mad at our society because of what it is doing to everyone! I am ready to all out rebel! And I could care less about the consequences because I am so damn DEPRESSED!! We have the right to be angry about this!
I am not out yet to everyone, nor do I plan to in my school life. I first want my parents to pay for my college education before I come out to them. Since my family isn't the most gay friendly.
My grandparents are conservative European immigrants on both sides of my dad's and mom's side of the family. Both of my parents grew up on farms to strict Christian families. I was born and brought up to farming, conservative, Christian parents, as in the case for most of my family.
Well, my parents came up to my college yesterday because they wanted to talk, and they told my brother and sisters (except the one i'm out to) that they were going on an "outing." Basically, after a week of deliberating over me coming out to them (which I did last saturday), they've decided that I like guys and am just saying that I like girls because I'm scared of commitment. Basically they asked me why I thought I was gay. I gave them my reasons, but they basically shot all of them down and kept repeating that I was really in love with my ex-boyfriend. I knew that when they were coming up that it would be to prove me wrong, and I had this huge argument in my head as to what I was going to say to defend myself, but I just couldn't get it out. I mean, it's one thing to tell your parents that you look at other girls, which is what I did, but I mean I just can't tell her that I imagine girls in a sexual way because she's my mother. And I couldn't say that I liked my bisexual friend, nor that I talked to her about it, because then I would end up outing her, which really isn't my place to do. I mean, she's basically out amongst people our age, but adults are different. So, I told her that I liked this straight girl in one of my classes, which i do have a bit of a crush on, but not the way I like my bi friend (although she has a boyfriend right now, so they're both about equally unavailiable). And she just says that's proof that I'm just trying to avoid a relationship. She kept saying how gay people just have all these random sex partners and how I'm going to get aids and venerial diseases and everything.
THIS IS A RECORD OF THE COMING TO BE OF A HOMOSEXUAL. RECORDS LIKE THIS HAVE EXISTED ALL THROUGH HISTORY, BUT HAVE BEEN SUBJECT TO CENSORSHIP, HAVE BEEN SUBJECT TO DESTRUCTION, TO CULTURAL CLEANSING, VANDALISM AND ORAL ALTERATION AS WELL AS PERSECUTION AND SUPPRESSION.
BUT I, ADAM ALEXANDER NATHANIEL DAVID JAMES ANDERSON, BORN ON THE 9TH OF FEBRUARY, 1998 IN ISRAEL, THE HOLY LAND, WILL NOT BE SILENCED, I WILL NOT STAND BY AND LET SOCIETY KILL ME, I WILL FIGHT FOR MY RIGHT TO EXIST. THROUGH THE SWEAT AND BLOOD, WHICH I GIVE WHOLEHEARTEDLY, I WILL BE HEARD.
I AM A SINGLE VOICE REPRESENTING MASSES OF PEOPLE. WE ARE RIDDEN WITH FEAR, WE ARE RIDDEN WITH GUILT AND SHAME, BUT IT SHOULD NOT BE THIS WAY.
"We gather here today to mourn the passing of Kalie Water. Who is also a loving friend, sister, daughter as well as a devoted civil union partner."
Teagan clenched her fists tightly. She was unable to unleash herself like those near her, who were drowning the church in a form of tense misery. It would be understandable and conventional for her to do the same but it is not her philosophy. She is not going to shed torturing tears.
Ok, there is a guy at the local school who plans on going to my high school next year. He is openly gay, and I thought it would be kewl to know him. Instead when I talked to him, he is just annoying. But it made me discover something about myself, and that is very effiminate gay men freak me out. I feel so bad about it, I am hoping it is just this one guy that is freaking me out.
As a lot of people on the site are into music and such, thought I'd pass along a new out musician that seems worth supporting, Laura Wolfe.
You can hear her music at www.myspace.com/laurawolfe
Here is some of her marketing copy:
"In her lyrics, Laura strongly expresses her views on pushing the edges of prescribed gender roles and appearances for women. In the title track, “Siren,
I have two lives, honestly. One is online, where everyone knows I'm
bisexual. The other one is offline (school and family life), where no one
does. I'm a loner at school, so feeling like I was lying to my friends was
However, I've known I was bisexual since the beginning of this school year
(seventh grade), and all of my best friends are online, and it killed me to
not tell them. There, I did feel like I was lying by not saying anything,
"I am 16, I am still in high school - and I am worried solely because I am defined a second-class citizen in this country. From issues relating to marriage (all 1,138 federal rights granted to heterosexual couples), to not being able to serve this country, to adoption and a number of other issues - I am not granted basic civil liberty that this country was founded upon, how is that constitutional?"
Read the whole story.
The School Girls Guide To The Galaxy
My eyes sprang open, wide with shock.
“Um, I hate to be a pain in the backside.. but, uh, what you’re doing is kinda a pain in MY backside
Interesting story over on CNN about a lesbian who beat three guys out to be crowned homecoming king, and caused some controvery on her liberal college campus in the process. Thoughts?
I'm still thinking that this is a gender-based role and she probably shouldn't have been in the running, and that the rules will be changed to make sure that is the case in the future, but for now, she's the king.
Do you guys have any idea how special we are? Even possibly in our genetic makeup? We have been around since the beginning of recorded history. The spanish conquistadores have documented something that is now referred to as TWO SPIRITED PEOPLE. Google it. Really amazing. We have been in every culture, at all points of the world. These are all our people. This is all our heritage. Take a look. Find out where you come from.
Do you have friends that just don't listen when you tell them that you're GLBTQ? Do you have friends that don't communicate?
Do you call them the Army and the Army National Guard?
Because that's what I call mine, and how I love them!
My favorite part is that they address me as "Dear American" and then try and seduce me with many dollars toward my education...but my education is more expensive than the many dollars they want to give me! $60,000 wouldn't even pay for two full years at the college I will be attending, and the added $20,000 enlistment bonus won't be enough to cover the end and a third.
what i'd like to ask those of you who are transgendered is this:
how did you come out to your friends? classmates? parents/family?
and in particular, to your boyfriend/girlfriend?
what was their reaction?
i am transsexual, work with GLBT adolescents, as well as presenting
workshops/panels/sensitivity training and eductaion on trans issues.
lots of times there are questions wondering what a safe way of coming out
I am going to read this at a peace event at school in a couple weeks. I'd love comments.
Raise your hands, to God on High
Weapons drawn, shall prophecy
Lives lost in vain
Hallowed Be Thy Name
United States, lies without shame
I swear to you this day
Say Democracy's the name of the game
For false idealism,
Is W to blame?
Paul and Dick and Bertie, too