my parents

out of the flames's picture

lets see...hmmm
well they don't accept me at all. they can't even look at me anymore. They cringe at my rainbow bracelet, the word CASTRO is like scary to them. I hate the feeling of not being loved. They think crazy things like my school did this to me, it is not fair. Nothing is fair anymore, i think the phrase has lost all meaning. They are always trying to change me, they won't let me form my own identity. I can't stand the feelings, my friends love me more than my parents do. I know they need time to accept me, but i can't stand it anymore it is tearling me up more than anyone can imagine, my life is just so sad and i hate the way i feel and i hate the way i have to hide.

Comments

erroltheturtle's picture

if the earth didnt suck, we w

if the earth didnt suck, we would all fall off. but its out there, that last feeble glimmering of hope that depression mistakes for a train. the good news is, the tunnel is only as long as you believe it to be. why should you even bother getting up in the morning? becuse you know, you really know inside that its not important how long or hard or visciously painful the struggle, but how sweet the reward. dont abandon us now.

adbak's picture

I have faith. They'll come around.

I've been through the same thing, perhaps not to the degree you describe, but things will get better. It's important not to let this affect you every waking moment. You will survive, and you'll come out a phoenix.

A word of advice, don't listen to Incubus' "Mexico." It'll open up the floodgates of emotion. It sure did for me. Then again, it might not be a bad thing to not let hate/anger/depression linger too long.

If I remember correctly, there'll be 5 stages of events. Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance. You've passed the denial stage by telling them and you're in the anger stage.
Bargaining - "Don't let your relatives know."
Depression - "What made you this way?"
Acceptance, I'm sure you can figure out what that would be.

Just my two cents.