I understand the implications of my subject statement and no, I don't believe procrastination is anything like cocaine. But I needed a title.
This will be a n interesting entry that does not revolve around the ass I'm not getting but instead around my hopes and dreams as a human being.
I really like Photography and I really like my camera. I spent most of all summer earning for it and most of the year planning how to purchase it. My only dilemma is that I'm not an art student, I'm a Computer Science major and a campus activist. I've taken on Photography Course in high school where I produced most of the images that I'm especially proud of. Since then I haven't produced as much because I don't have the time to put into it (especially the darkroom stuff) and I don't have the money to pay for regular film development. I've decided to change all that though.
I can take Photo Courses that my college doesn't offer at the University in town. I'm hoping to do this for the purposes of turning myself into an artist, or at the very least gain access to the good darkroom resources on campus that are only open to art students (I hear they have a film scanner *swoon*). It's weird thought cause in the back of my mind I keep getting this feeling that it might just be a quick obsession that I put all of my material wants into and then forget about later, or that I really shouldn't waste my resources and credits that I could apply to a more lucrative minor this way.
The other part of me keeps saying that I could take suck kick-ass pictures after I finish, especially if I go to Senegal. I really want to go to Senegal. At first is was just some idea. I'm black I should see Africa... but then it turned into something more in my mind. I keep on imagining writing these long letters home about my profound experience in my ancestral home. I imagine writing things like, "I've been wanting to come here since I was fifteen but I've been truly waiting to be here my whole life."
I wanna cry on the island that used to hold slaves waiting to be packed into Ships for the americas thought The Middle Passage. I want to have this feeling of finally returning home for the first time in 400 years. I tell my self it will be like that but I don't at the same time. Africa is so complex, African-Americans are so westernized, Africa isn't free yet... But it is still home so home I must go. There is so much i'll do, so much I'll learn and So many wonderful photos I will take. I can't wait!
Just a year to go...