Some stuff that happened to me.

crookedsmile's picture

1)I don't have a blazing headache right now. And it has nothing to do with wine.
Especially the red kind.

2) My Dad was in the process of opening an industrial cardboard box containing
a DIY desk last night. He was ripping and ripping and ripping with his bare
hands for so long that I was actually briefly annoyed, then I tuned it out,
then I became Hulk-style hyper-annoyed when I became aware of it again.

"OH MY GOD WHY DON'T YOU GET SOME SCISSORS???" I shouted across the... three
and a half feet.

"I don't want to cut the wood."

That was his answer.

"I don't want to cut the wood."

Well. I don't think I have to tell you what happened then. I think it's safe
to assume that no one has been as inundated with horror "remember the time
I was clipping coupons and I accidentally chopped the kitchen table in half?"
stories as my Dad was in that next ten minutes.

3)I was typing a email to some jerk from school who screwed me over on this
one projecty thingy. So picture my rage when the "R" key on my computer
failed to operate. I started an email saying that I was ve_y ve_y
disappointed and then went on to say how ang_y I felt. Moving
quickly on to tell them that they were "lia_s" and not only that they were
"basta_d lia_s" and that I was ext_emely disappointed with them.

I shouted at the key board; nothing happened. I punched the keyboard; got
bruised knuckles. I took the keyboard outside and got a hammer and
punched the fuck out of it while shouting "You fucking bastard keyboard. I
fucking hate you." Then looked up to see our new neighbours pootling around
in their yard.

Good afternoon to you too.


niks121997's picture

Don't you hate...

...days that are filled with annoyances. Huh that could possibly be every day. I love how you maintain humor throughout it though. Break the damn keyboard. Rip the "e" off the panel and eat it. Or if you don't want indigestion or the possibility of internal tearing, nix that idea.

"All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream."