I feel like a slut.....This happened a while back: Ian's best friend Richi asked me out. I said yes. I realized I really REALLY liked Ian. I admitted it to both of them. Richi and I broke up. He took it pretty well. I apologized, and feel extremely bad for doing that to him. We're still friends. I asked Ian out. Before he answered me, a girl I've known forever asked me out. I said yes. I apologized to Ian so much. And we're still very good friends. This girl and I went out for about 2 or 3 months. She broke up with me, said things were getting confusing. I found out she was back with her ex. We had a fight about it. She said I made her reconsider the whole thing. She broke up with her ex, said she wanted to be alone for a while. I emailed her and said a bunch of things, basically telling her I was still in love with her. She said I was obsessing over her. I emailed her again and said there's a difference between loving someone and obsessing over them. Before, she promised me she'd tell me if she did anything behind my back. I found out from a friend that she had cheated on me. So in the email, I also mentioned that I'd found out about that. Then I said bye. She emailed me back, and all she said was bye. Surprisingly, I'm not even upset about it. I guess I've realized that she really wasn't right for me and maybe my feelings weren't as real as I thought they were.
The problem now is that I still REALLY like Ian. I told him that my girlfriend and I broke up. I haven't said anything about still liking him. My feelings for him have never changed, and I will never stop regretting what I did to him. I'm scared to say anything about this to him, because I don't want him to think I'm a slut or anything like that. I want to ask him out, but I don't know if I should. Maybe it would be best to wait and see if he says anything about it. I don't know what to do! If anyone has any advice, I would GREATLY appreciate it!!! (And I feel really stupid in a way, because this is all online..........yes, I'm immature, I know....)