she has a boyfriend. that doesn't necessarily mean she doesn't like girls. but i give up. she's nice, she's beautiful, and i wanted to get to know her. but it feels like someone ripped my heart to shreds. i feel sick. why couldn't she have been gay? why couldn't i have had a chance? at least a little one? i don't even care anymore... i'm going to go lay in bed and cry myself to sleep so i don't have to think about anything for the rest of the day. i hate my life.