Still doin' her thing!

Jazzer's picture

Hi kids,

Michael here, with a much-needed posting. Let's see what's been going on as of late....

Well first off, the chorus had a show this past weekend. It was utterly fabulous: it was our annual Adults-Only Cabaret, and let me tell you, the amount of inappropriate behavior was abound! This is our one time to sing all the dirty songs we've been wanting. It's really quite fun, too. Being that this is a highly politically charged year, we had some anti-administration songs to throw into the mix, and of course, all the politicos LOVED them! Believe it or not, this is a show that we work really hard on every year, so the content AND the production quality are both high, just like any one of our other shows. And for heaven's sake, we had a kickline in our opening number! How the hell can you go wrong with that?

I'm still up to my antics every now and again. For example, last week I went out (without the boyfriend) with some friends to go hang out and have a good time. We started off at the twink bar for cheap vodka night, and then after a drink or two (literally!), I was feeling rather tipsy (I hadn't eaten anything prior to drinking). Remember, I'm a cheap date--it only takes me two and I'm good and tipsy.

So after 4 drinks at the twink bar, something strange happened. It's not strange, because it happens all the time. You see, when I get to a certain point of inebriation, all of the sudden when things around me don't interest me, I just decide to leave and go elsewhere. I don't tell my friends and I usually wait until nobody's looking to leave. It pisses my friends off, but they know I don't REALLY mean to be so inconsiderate. When we're out, most of my behavior is excused the moment after I say, "Momma's tipsy!"

After I left the bar, I went across the street to another one, and met up with a bartender friend of mine, who was, incidentally, WAY drunk. But he was off his shift, so it was all cool. I had a couple drinks with him and before I knew it, I was 7 drinks into my evening (again, keep in mind, I'm a lightweight).

As we were talking, we started to sexually harass the cute cocktail waiter that works there (I mean, what else is there to do?). He was having a good time with us--at least, he hasn't pressed charges yet--and he soon ended his shift at work. One thing leads to another, and we're playing a game of pool. Of course, I'm WAY drunk and he's as sober as he could be. Since we were asking him to show us his penis the whole night, that's what we were betting on: if I won, he showed me his, and vice versa.

And you'd better believe I won. Being somewhat of an expert at the subject, I can say with complete certainty that his penis was quite nice. :)

When I talked to Josef the next day, he was as giddy as I was about the evening (he knows I'd never do something sleazy like cheat on him), and I told him that we'd try and have him do it again. Tonight, we're going out to celebrate one of my friends' 21st birthday parties, so that'll be a kick. It's interesting, he's "straight," but he's hung out with a group of gay friends and I at gay bars and stuff. He frequents them a little too much to be considered a really hip straight guy, so we all have our suspicions, but none of us say anything. We just keep our mouths shut and wait for him to come out to us. :-P

I think that does it for me this time. I've gotta do laundry--Momma's not sure how many days more she can go commando! And as always, behave and be nice, so you don't turn out like me.



Dan84's picture


Oh, Michael. You always amuse me with your various antics and adventures. Keep 'em coming!

Thanks for the laugh,