Clean

extreme447's picture

For the first time in i don't even remember how long (probably 2 years-ish) i can finally say with absolute certainty that i am over Kathleen. Completely and utterly over her. Even if she offered a one night stand i would not take her up on it. This is serious progress. I had been hung up on this straight girl for far too long. I barely even talk to her anymore. Which is a good thing because the relationship was never really that healthy to begin with. She always tended to be kind of neurotic, and you always had to guess what she was thinking. If anything i would call her borderline, but who am i to make such judgement. She hasn't even been in my fantasies for a few months which is HUGE because she used to basically be the star.

On another note i had one of the best New Years Eves ever. It consisted of getting the good kind of trashed out at a friend's Cape house. I was the only lesbian there which for once was a good thing because i could just have fun with my friends without dealing with any sexual tension/longing. Cape Cod is awesome this time of year too because it tends to be rather abandoned which allows for basically doing whatever the hell you want. We ended up meeting up with some college kids who were down there doing the same thing we were. Fun times were had. I was even a good kid and turned down the drugs i was offered. I have been clean of all drugs save butts and alcohol since October. That is like a record for me since 8th grade. I plan on keeping up the abstinance too. Hah i make it sound like i did Heroine or something. I always stayed away from both that and cocaine because i didn't want to become irrevocably addicted. I always sticked mostly to pot with a few dalliances into pain killers, adderol, shrooms, and ecstacy. O well. I decided that i like my brain the way it is so all of that is over now. No more drugs, hopefully, ever. That is the plan at least.

Comments

sistinesylph's picture

I'm very proud of you!

I know I don't know you but, anyone who quits is my personal hero. Thank you.

"Man it takes a silly girl
to lie about the dreams she has.
But lord, it takes a lonely one to wish
that she had never dreamt at all."

KieBem81's picture

im proud of you too... :) its hard to say no

"If you love someone, tell them for hearts are often broken by words left unspoken"

1 in 3 women think of having sex or experimenting with other women

"Should I smile because we're friends or frown because thats all we'll ever be?"

cnn* :)