So I was contra dancing again last night (without all the juniors and seniors, because they were at the semi--including Alan and Kate--so it was only me and Alan's old girlfiend, who I don't feel like making up a name for right now...). It wasn't as much fun without the usual upperclassmen crowd, but it was OK. OK, so maybe I missed flirting with the guys from our group, and I always had to find someone to dance with when they weren't there. My problem was I really wanted to ask the girls to dance. There were so many pretty girls there! I couldn't stop looking at one... Anyway, I couldn't really ask one to dance because:
1. I didn't know any of them.
2. There were enough guys to dance with--I would have been conspicuous.
3. I didn't know how to dance the guy's part, and I couldn't expect the girl to.
I mean, the folk crowd is pretty accepting of queerness, but I'm not ready to come out yet. Though I did feel like shouting every now and then "Is anyone here a lesbian?" Though I didn't.
Hmm... I'm not quite sure what to do about this problem. I always had some attraction to guys at dances before. Tonight there weren't many cute, young guys, so maybe that's it. But I distinctly remember a dance last fall where I was noticing girls and guys and thought, "I love being bisexual!"
Oh well, I guess those days are going now...