Oh my god, I just discovered bisexuality!!
I read this one article online about bisexuality while looking for reasons why bisexuality does not exist when I realised that my definition/ idea of bisexuality was all wrong.
For someone so smart ( yeah even if I do say so myself) I am so exhaustingly obtuse.
All I along I figured that bisexuals were just confused individuals with an inability to choose/ or commit to one group (males) or the other (female). In my opinion being bisexual was like sitting on the fence, fearing to make a choice/ decision, being neither gay nor straight and therefore lacking a (sexual) identity altogether.
However, today, the reality all came crashing down on me when I realised that, I got it all wrong from the start. Being bisexual does not mean being exactly 50/50 and therefore one tends neither to one sex nor the other no…
Being bisexual is being real, being human.
My eye tends to wander from male to female, and though I tried so hard to be straight and that failed and I later tried so hard to be gay and that failed- I needed an excuse so I picked a sexual orientation…. And so I concluded that since it was so much cooler to be gay… I would call myself a gay chick with slight appreciation for dudes. Any thing BUT bisexual right. ;) see the way i saw it was…
If a vegetarian.. who had been so all his life, on one or two VERY rare occasions eats a meat, then do they cease to be a vegetarian?? No, they’re just a vegetarian who enjoys the occasional steak.
Ah yet another error on my part. I compared my sexual situation to a vegetarian’s dilemma. :!. Sex/ sexuality is not as lucid as that. Its not as simple as being vegetarian or not being so, because there is not degree of vegetarianism, no midpoint, no scale/calibration… just two extremes to be or not to be(ef). ;)
Its like a thermometer with only two extremes, two marked points- 100 degrees and 0 degrees. How does one measure the day’s temperature thus? What if its 28 degrees Celsius and because your thermometer’s only got two readings ( the equivalent of hot and cold) what right does one have to therefore conclude that- oh snap, its not on my thermometer so therefore such a temp. does not exist.
Anyway- bottom line is, I switched thermometers, and stuck the new ( precisely marked) one up my arm only to find that I’m not too hot… not to cold… just bisexual.