w8tin4life's picture

lately ive been on alot of dates with these bicurious preppy girls and i just cant stand how i can never carry on a conversation with them.(i dont mean all bicurious preps are like that). but recently ive been tlaking to this amazing, stunning, brilliant, funny, and beautiful girl named michelle. she is the first girl ive known here that doesnt have an i.Q OF a chair. promblem: im not exactly sure of her sexuality. Usually i would go up to someone and ask them out because thats just the kinda person i am, but with here, i cant bring my self to try. its killing me. im scared if i do ill lose someone that thrills me with everything she does. its horriable being that close to her and not being able to tell her how i feel, but it would be the end of the world if i could never talk to her again. it would kill me. im so lost. help me


jeff's picture


The idea here is that you want to retain this amazing connection that you have with her by continuing to deny your actual self? Where is the difficult battle?

If you tell her your feelings, and she is into them, great.

If you tell her your feelings, and she is not into them, then she decides how things go. But, if she has nothing to do with you as a result, are you really losing an important person in your life? She would be telling you that your connection cannot survive you being your authentic self.

If you tell her your feelings, and she is also not into them, she can also be cool with it, and then it becomes your additional job to accept that the way things are are the way they will continue to be.

But, there is really no downside to any of this, when it comes down to lying to maintain your "happiness," or telling the truth to have an authentic relationship, as I would imagine that you are getting more out of things than she is now, because you are constantly having to hide your truth.

gods_favorite_color's picture

Its ok

I know who you are talking about...she is really nice, and if you tell her she wont think any less of you and she wont break away from you. Sarah pretty much hates me now so...i need to find someone...Brandons cute but? Eh? to clingy? So ARG, why is this so hard of a time in everyones life?

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FlameFish08's picture

is she into u?

what jeff said about having to pretend to stay happy is true, but i get what you mean about not wanting to ruin something so great. but my question for u is, what feeelings do u get from her? do you get certain vibes from her that make you think shes into you? maybe you could bring up the topic somehow and see how she reacts. thats what i did when i came out to the first person, my best friend. i was really scared for a while bcause i didnt want to lose her friendship. but one night we were talking about alex, the gay girl from the o.c., and i just came out with it. so you may not even plan when you tell her, it may just comeout when its right. but in the meantime, if shes as great as you say she is, i think it would be helpful if you told her, it sounds like she wouldnt overreact to bad. so you don't have to rush it, but tell her when you think its right.