Ahhh... I am so freaked out/pissed off/disoriented/sick/confused/angry/fucked... AH
Okay, so my fucking boyfriend and I planned to hang out tonight. I'm leaving for Europe on Monday so this is the last time we'd get to be together for like two and a half weeks. He said we were definately doing it on Monday, again on Wednesday, and this morning. Then, after school, I went to ask what time he'd pick me up and stuff, and he started saying something about having to go to a wake, and planning to hang out with other people. So, naturally, I said, "Wait. What?" "Well, uh. I'll call you if I can go out, okay?" And then he runs off.
FYI, "I'll call you if I can go out," is his language, means "I won't call you because I can't go out."
I know this is a pretty minor incident, but this is like the third time it's happened and I'm just so fucking mad because I REALLY like him and he just... Doesn't care. He makes me feel completely meaningless, and now I'm just so... Disoriented. Like, what the fuck have I been doing for the past two months? WHY did I ever think this could work at all? It's fucking killing me. I'm at a total loss. I guess I should probably just end it or something. I don't know. I'm kind of a sick over it. Ehh.
If you guys have anything nice to say, I'd appreciate it. I feel like shit.