You guys that live in the UK might have seen Middlesex on Thursday, and for everyone who didn't or doesn't live here it was basically this program looking at sexuality and gender and how it's treated all over the world and that. I was cleaning my room and plucking my eyebrows and normal nighttime things like that while it was on so I missed bits of it but what I saw was pretty fascinating.
It opened with the story of this transgender girl who was beat up and killed by these four boys, two of which had been her lovers. Basically they'd been at a party and it had gotten out she hadn't always been a she and the boys I guess were embarrassed everyone knew they'd slept with what they thought of as essentially a guy and...they killed her.
Then there was an interview with her mother who had a picture of her daughter on a table and honestly if I would picture a preppy American homecoming queen...it would have looked like her. This girl was in no way an obvious transsexual, she looked...too pretty. I know that’s a shocking thing to say but that’s how I felt and I think that’s how the audience were supposed to feel. We just weren't expecting to see a hot, normal looking girl. It was a great way to open the program and it kina got me hooked so I kept on watching...and it was so worth it.
Overall, the program went over different stories from western transsexuals to Thai ladyboys and it discussed what makes gender and how important gender is as well as how it affects our sexuality.
One of the stories was on a little nine-year-old boy called Noah who I guess...acted like a girl. He had lots of dressing up clothes, wrapped sarongs around to make halter necks, skirts, and stuff, played with dolls, and just did things you wouldn’t see in an average boy.
His parents were from somewhere near Texas (I think and I’m only going by the accent) and his mum was so scared he was going to be beat up when he got older and stuff and his dad was basically trying not to be homophobic and it was honestly just the strangest situation. His mum said at one point though "he's only nine, he didn't chose this" and it just made me think...isn't this proof that the boundaries of gender don't exist. It's obviously not in this boy's nature to be 'manly' if every boy was supposed to act 'manly' then he wouldn't exist...he couldn't have chosen to act so 'gay'. He doesn't even know what that is!
I'm not sure I’m making sense but this is all kind of confusing in my head. ^.^
It also had a story of an American guy who seen a picture of a Taiwanese ladyboy on the net, then obsessed with her he left his wife, kids and job, hopped on a plane and went to live with this girl.
Then he started telling the interviewer that he hoped she would never have gender reassignment surgery because the fact she had 'boy parts' (I love that phrase) made their sex life amazing. ^.^
I nearly died in my seat when he said that. I'm pretty sure any other yaoi-girls out there who seen it had the same urge to go up to him and congratulate him for actually being honest about what he liked in bed.
I think I’ve totally wondered off topic...then again I’m not sure I had a point in the first place except to share how insightful this program was with you.
It just made me think that we'll all be so much happier if we can just admit what we like is different from what society wants us to like, and we'd all get along so much better if people would just leave us to do our thing.
I know most of us on Oasis wouldn't find a 19 year old Taiwanese girl with "boy parts" (I swear I’m taking that phrase to the grave with me) very attractive, but this guy obviously did. I mean he left his whole life to live in a part of the world he knew nothing about in a country he’d barely ever heard of with a girl he’d just met. To the rest of the world I doubt this girl is a potential love interest but she knew that too…I mean she put herself on the Internet just trying to find someone who would be interested in her for what she was.
But the fact this guy found her so attractive and liked everything about her enough for them to last ten years together makes her so goddamn special. For him to see how beautiful she is when no one else does…must make her even more beautiful to him.
That’s how I reckon we should think. Just because no one else is attracted to what we are, just because they don’t see beauty where we do, it doesn’t mean what we see isn’t beautiful…because it is!
And the fact we can see what everyone else can’t should make it even more precious to us. I know it does to me. If I can appreciate beauty in something others can’t, well I’m thankful for that and I’m not going to lie and pretend I don’t find it beautiful just because I’m not supposed to -because I don’t want to take it for granted!
Am I making any sense?
I just really needed to try and get this down in words because I can’t actually talk to any of my friends about it and it’s something I think about a lot. I love my friends I really do…but they just don’t get me when it comes to this stuff. For them I think attraction is pretty black and white.
That’s so far from the truth when it comes to me…it feels like the most confusing thing in the world right now. But I reckon it’s worth it ^.^ And I have a feeling this won’t be the last diary entry on this subject either…
Any comments? Anyone actually read this far?