A positive change in me?

Paladin's picture

Wow. It's my second last day here, in this part of the world, and I'm starting to feel a lot more love for my parents than ever before. I'm noticing how much they put up with me and look out for my best interests.

I don't fully understand it, since nothing significant has changed since yesterday. But I'm volunteering to help out a bit around the house, clearing the table and trying not to trouble them. I'm making conversation with them every now and then. If I were to be fully expressive, I might tell them I loved them.

Worst of all is that I'm starting to feel as though I owe them something. I feel like saying I'm sorry for not appreciating their efforts. I wouldn't be in as good a position as I am now if it weren't for their hard work to fund my education, and their raising me to be who I am. I wouldn't have considered that relevant a few weeks ago. If flying to the other side of the world is what is needed for me to respect them more, then I definitely made the right choice.

But tomorrow night at the airport, I doubt that they will notice that I care any more for them than I did in the past. I'm not one to show that sort of emotion, and I don't really know how without things feeling awkward. I wonder if that will ever change. I hope so.

Comments

toblerone's picture

Awww...

It's always times like this that you appreciate your parents the most. Me, for example, when I left for NZ, I felt so alone, and needed them to know how much I loved them and missed them. However, after getting back on track of school, it gradually faded. It's just a phase. I still miss them, but not in a sad kind of way.

I'd say just follow your emotions tomorrow. If you feel like crying, do so, if you feel like saying 'I love you', do so. I'm sure your parents will feel you.

That's my 0.02c. Hope u have a nice trip! Write to us once you get to Dartemouth!

Tobz.