just in case you want a cheap laugh

ledworldnuke's picture

> For those who love the philosophy of hypocrisy and ambiguity....
> 1. Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
> 2. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor...
> 3. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
> 4. If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys
> and apes?
> 5. The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all
the
> bad girls live.
> 6. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the
> self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the
> purpose.
> 7. What if there were no hypothetical questions?
> 8. If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?
> 9. If someone with multiple personalities threaten to kill himself,
is
> it considered a hostage situation?
> 10. Is there another word for synonym?
> 11. Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all?"
> 12. What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an
> endangered plant?
> 13. If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
> 14. Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
> 15. Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone
will
> clean them?
> 16. If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
> 17. Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?
> 18. If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to
> remain silent?
> 19. Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines?
> 20. How do they get deer to cross the road only at those yellow road
> signs?
> 21. What was the best thing before sliced bread?
> 22. One nice thing about egotists: they don't talk about other
people.
> 23. Does the Little Mermaid wear an algebra?
> 24. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
> 25. How is it possible to have a civil war?
> 26. If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown, too?
> 27. If you ate both pasta and antipasto, would you still be hungry?
> 28. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
> 29. Whose cruel idea was it for the word "Lisp" to have "S" in it?
> 30. Why are hemorrhoids called "hemorrhoids" instead of "assteroids"?
> 31. Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?
> 32. Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?
> 33. If you spin an oriental man in a circle three times does he
become
> disoriented?

Comments

Cheyennelovesu15's picture

hahahah lmao. Great jokes..or

hahahah lmao. Great jokes..or question like jokes.

-Cheyenne

Sapincher's picture

I love you. *loves*

I love you for posting this. *loves*