Yes, I really do hate her. And I think it's really screwing me up. I can't even be honest with her; she'll punish me if I say anything she doesn't want to hear. Really, if I "hurt" her (emotionally), she'll yell and make me apologize, even if it was true. And if I don't she'sll kick me out of the house. My dad will have to pick me up, and eventually he'll make me apologize and make up. I do it for him. I don't know why I can't get the courage to just leave and move in with him. I guess it's because my dad already paid for my private school, and I don't want to burden him when he already works very hard. I also fear change and transition. I honestly don't know what my mom would do if I tried to move out. She might let me go, and then only have my sister to let out her hatred and anger on by controlling, or she may try to get me back. She hates it when I show any signs of being loyal to my dad instead of her. And if I actually moved out, and then had to live with her, she would torture me. My life would be hell. I'm also kind of afraid that she might actually hurt me. When I'm honest with her, she tells me she hates me and wants to hurt me and that I'm evil. What if she loses control one time? What should I do? Does anyone have any advice?