Online Relationships: Not safe and Unstable

Gerardo's picture

Okay, a few people on oasis have been dating. I thought this issue needed to be brought up. I was going out with someone on here. I understand that you want to go out with someone and feel loved by someone. Online relationships are not the right thing. They have made me hurt and I am just look out for all of you.

The first harm area of online dating is an unconfirmed identity. First of all you could be dating a total freak or pervert. It is not sensible to start a relationship without knowing this person in real life. At least talk on the phone a bit send plenty of pictures etc. TRUTH: People online are not like themselves in real life. That love letter that you see on the screen can not be expressed to your face. They could be lieing right in front of your face, although you have no idea because you can't see them or hear them. Someone online that you might think is a badass, arrogant, rebel could be the exact opposite person you are looking for.

The second harm area of online dating is not being able to have physical contact. When you love someone, you want to be with them. You want to cuddle with them or make love. Online dating limits that. When you listen to them it makes you want them more. It caused a lot of trauma for me, and eventually if you are in one, it will cause a lot for you.

The third harm area of online dating is putting a stop to outside social life. Your social life outside gets ruined when you are online talking to someone you haven't met. I used to wake up early, get to bed late, cancel social trips, etc. and that got me glued to the computer even more. The Internet and computer causes people to become anti-social and more aware. Frankly I believe that ignorance is bliss, and the people that are totally oblivious are the happiest. It is suprising, but hapiness is hard to find when you aren't looking. You could find a soulmate outside of the internet. Just go look. Make friends. Give it time. Thee is no easy way to find LGBT people (unless you live in provincetown mass.) It is hard for all of us not just you.

The final harm area is no trust. The Internet does not let you build trust with your partner. Your partner could be cheating on you with billy under the bleachers and using you for fun!!!

The computer and internet dating put a lot of stress on your daily life. Do not let it ruin yours.

(If I missed anything that anyone would like to add please do! anything constructive is needed)

~Jerry

Comments

Gerardo's picture

ooooo

bitch I'll get out my gun that I hide in my thong and blast your brains

--------------
HATE is a strong word, but so is LOVE

Sesshoumaru s male lover's picture

well that show's how much roo

well that show's how much room you have down there.
Cogito Ergo Sum

Lost Angry Youth's picture

LOL!i bet it's only a .22

LOL!
i bet it's only a .22
LOL!
(:

more like 2.2!
(:

Sesshoumaru s male lover's picture

that is funny.^_^ Cogito Erg

that is funny.^_^
Cogito Ergo Sum

Gerardo's picture

okay now no one is getting ki

okay now no one is getting kitty whore dances
SHOP IS CLOSED

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HATE is a strong word, but so is LOVE

Sesshoumaru s male lover's picture

that's ok we'll find a new wh

that's ok we'll find a new whore,the gay world is full of them.
Cogito Ergo Sum

Gerardo's picture

bye bye!!!! I wouldnt have s

bye bye!!!!
I wouldnt have sucked any of your small dicks anyways

Lol
=D

--------------
HATE is a strong word, but so is LOVE

Lost Angry Youth's picture

*sigh* denial is such a terr

*sigh*
denial is such a terrible thing...

Gerardo's picture

I know you should really acce

I know you should really accept the size of your dick
it shows a lot of courage

--------------
HATE is a strong word, but so is LOVE

Lost Angry Youth's picture

it's kind of hard to measure

it's kind of hard to measure it when it's down your throat
(:

Sesshoumaru s male lover's picture

true,I like you,you are funny

true,I like you,you are funny.
Cogito Ergo Sum

Lost Angry Youth's picture

is this when you fall in love

is this when you fall in love with me?
(:

Gerardo's picture

and when was this dream? =P

and when was this dream?
=P
I dont have time for this
you and quitty can lick eachothers rims

=D
bibi

--------------
HATE is a strong word, but so is LOVE

Sesshoumaru s male lover's picture

You dont have the time

You

dont have the time ,but yet you keep come back.

Cogito Ergo Sum

Lost Angry Youth's picture

LMAO! i think you are gettin

LMAO!
i think you are getting the hang of this!
LOL!
(:

Sesshoumaru s male lover's picture

I think so too.now where Mr.

I think so too.now where Mr. faggy pants go?
Cogito Ergo Sum

Lost Angry Youth's picture

LMAO! okay..NOW THAT WAS FUN

LMAO!
okay..NOW THAT WAS FUNNY!
(:
i think the kitty whore dance hour is about to begin and
he had to adjust his pecker
(:
"...Mr.faggy pants" LOL! god thats classic!
(:

Sesshoumaru s male lover's picture

He had to add some bulk to hi

He had to add some bulk to his package,because there is noen.
Cogito Ergo Sum

Lost Angry Youth's picture

someone should start a thre

someone should start a thread like this more often..
(:
later ...

Lost Angry Youth's picture

why do you keep saying "bye"

why do you keep saying "bye" and then keep coming back here?!
LOL
(:

Gerardo's picture

woah now when did this happen

woah now when did this happen?

aww quitty cant help him self
he must have you! lol
XD

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HATE is a strong word, but so is LOVE

Sesshoumaru s male lover's picture

I don't want him like that,ma

I don't want him like that,maybe you though whore.God I'm so horny crys
Cogito Ergo Sum

Lost Angry Youth's picture

WTF?! i have no idea what you

WTF?! i have no idea what you just said!
(:

Sesshoumaru s male lover's picture

what do you mean Cogito Ergo

what do you mean
Cogito Ergo Sum

Lost Angry Youth's picture

it just did... now brace you

it just did...
now brace yourself i am about to cum
(:

Sesshoumaru s male lover's picture

that's fine,I'm to big for a

that's fine,I'm to big for a little boy like you to handle anyway.
Cogito Ergo Sum

Lost Angry Youth's picture

it's okay i guess i have to s

it's okay i guess i have to settle for a blow job
(:

Lost Angry Youth's picture

"gun" as in "dick" and "bla

"gun" as in "dick"
and "blast your brains"
as in bustin' a fat nut!
(:
LOL

Gerardo's picture

you are sick jesus christ

you are sick

jesus christ you need to upshut about sex
someone is a little horny

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HATE is a strong word, but so is LOVE

Sesshoumaru s male lover's picture

I blame it on the anti-psch

I blame it on the anti-psch I take,being really horny is a side affect.Also tyler seems to be a better person than I though he is.
plus we are guys so we are always horny anyways.
Cogito Ergo Sum

Lost Angry Youth's picture

upshut?! (: LOL!

upshut?!
(:
LOL!

Sesshoumaru s male lover's picture

You don't like being called n

You don't like being called nice do you?
Cogito Ergo Sum

Lost Angry Youth's picture

i don't like being called 100

i don't like being called 100 times a day
by crazy girls
(:

Sesshoumaru s male lover's picture

I'm not a girl so don't worry

I'm not a girl so don't worry about it.
Cogito Ergo Sum

Lost Angry Youth's picture

no but i have a nagging suspi

no but i have a nagging suspicion you like to
wear panties and do little kitty whore dances
(:

Sesshoumaru s male lover's picture

No,I don't,I woun't even wear

No,I don't,I woun't even wear underpants if I had a choice.
Cogito Ergo Sum

Lost Angry Youth's picture

what are you gonna do? grab

what are you gonna do?
grab his waist and gyrate it?!
LOL!

try sticking your thumb up his ass and wiggling a little bit
LOL!

Gerardo's picture

tyler you better watch out or

tyler you better watch out or ill blast you too!

--------------
HATE is a strong word, but so is LOVE

Lost Angry Youth's picture

did you just say you are gonn

did you just say you are gonna "BLAST" me with your "GUN"?
and you call ME a PERV...
(:
you could "blast" me anytime bad boy
(:

Sesshoumaru s male lover's picture

I was thinking more along t

I was thinking more along the lines of neck grabing
Cogito Ergo Sum

Lost Angry Youth's picture

HERE YOU GO!

HERE YOU GO!

GAY KITTY WHORE DANCE FOR EVERYONE!!!

Sesshoumaru s male lover's picture

Night bitchs Cogito Ergo Sum

Night bitchs
Cogito Ergo Sum

darkhuntingtiger's picture

you are a hypocrite.......

You tried to get me to help you cheat on Brandon and thank god we both saw that was wrong. You are being a hypocrite. Online relationships have been great. I almost marreid a guy who I met online but we eventually decided not to (and for none of the reasons you mentioned).

It doesnt ruin your life, in fact many people have been happy with online relationships. You are just bitter because yours ended up badly. If you had wanted to leave Brandon you should have done it sooner if it made you so miserable.

Gerardo's picture

umm hun im not miserable I

umm hun im not miserable

I realised that being on the computer 24/7 can make me miserable
and it literally ruined my life over the summer
I look back and I was a mess
I didnt use you at all
and I didnt try to get help from you to cheat on him
I liked you
But then you turned around and acted like a FUCKER to brandon

and right now he doesnt need that
SO FUCK YOU

--------------
HATE is a strong word, but so is LOVE

Gerardo's picture

oh yeah and he was only *goin

oh yeah and he was only *going* to marry you because he felt Sorry

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HATE is a strong word, but so is LOVE

NovaCat's picture

Not to have this turn into a

Not to have this turn into a flame-forum, but frankly:

Lost Angry Youth, why are you such an ass all the time? It's not difficult to just refrain from saying provocative, unproductive, rude things all the time. People come to this website to talk to each other and share ideas, get support, give comfort, and generally vent about their frustrations, and I'm pretty sure no one appreciates you flooding every fucking forum and journal entry with trollish, insulting comments.

Please, just do us a favor and spare us all the bullshit.

Lost Angry Youth's picture

only if you promise to spare

only if you promise to spare me yours
(:

NovaCat's picture

Deal. As I have not posted a

Deal. As I have not posted any, you are then obligated not to as well.

Lost Angry Youth's picture

jeff's picture

Personally...

I think the third issue is the biggest, and I know I messed up in that regard. I had an online boyfriend half a country away and I was turning down local guys who wanted to date?! Crazy... oh well, live and learn.

As for trust, you could just as easily cheat on someone in person as online. I don't think that ranks as high as the others. If anything, my guess is that there might be more inclination to interact with people in the same physical location, rather than sit home and IM their boyfriend, but that's not really the same as a lack of trust. Just a human need for social interaction, whether it is romantic or not. Of course, if some hottie gives you attention, it might start to seem more interesting than e-mails, IMs, etc.

Uncofirmed identity? I can do that in real life, too. You may know what I look like, etc., etc., but you can always make up background and other stuff. So, I don't see that one gives you more confirmation than the other.

One thing I have learned on Oasis, though, is that you can never stop people from making the same mistakes. You just support them, provide your opinion when they ask, help them with their choices, and support them whatever happens. Beyond that, you'll just get frustrated.

And, there are the rare examples where things do end up working out (see you add things like that to the end of a post, and people will always just think they are the exception to the rule. Cuts down on flames).