Christmas Stress & Joy

formula_truth_love's picture

Well first me my sister mother went to my favorite cousin's house. But lately she has been really distant after her mother my aunt died in 2001. She started to be more with her boyfriend marks family and she got pregnant. But recently she's been calling once and a while saying hi and so on. But what stressed me out was that the whole time she kept talking to her friends that where there and barely said like 15 words consistently together. I was disappointed she knows i am bi but her and all my family are religious you'll know how much when i tell you about my trip over to my Aunt's house. Well it was my Uncle Den My Aunt Denise My cous i haven't seen in forever Cheyenne but we call her Chey for short who loves The Packers like me My Cous Chaz and my Second Cous Rae'Quan. Well at one point they were talking about my Aunt Annie's ex husband Steve who left her after she found out that he was two timing her with a man for years. They are getting a divorce and he is living with his boyfirend. Well they were talking about the child they share together and how he wanted him for christmas morning and she did too. Well my Unc Den was going to get some more coke because all the adults were having rum & coke. Me and my sister since we are twins we are 15 not legal but they gave us coolers not as strong as rum & coke.

Well as he was walking out to go they were talking about it and what made me made was they referred to Steve's boyfriend as the insignificant other. I mean i don't like what he did to my Aunt i know he was proabally scared to come out or admit he was gay. I just think that cheating on her was fucking mean. But being that i like girls i kinda get it but don't forgive his actions. Well then after they said that they all started laughing my mom included. Then they all said they were going to pray that he found his way. Which ti me makes me believe that they are praying that he finds his way to being straight. A little later on when we were leaving My Aunt Denise was like to you say happy Birthday to god it's his day. Plus how if he hadn't of done what he did we wouldn't be here and all this stuff about hell and things. Also when they were talking about Steve and his boyfriend i heard the word hell but couldn't hear what they were saying before and after. I was feeling like i wanted to cry it was upsetting now i was thinking oh they are all definatly going to hate me saying that they hoped he found his wway when i just wanted to say he did find it and i have too. Which wouldn't have been smart. Plus for like 15 minutes they all except my cous Chey hasseled me and my sis about if we had a boyfriend and i thought no and i don't have a girl either. Then i thought i am not too good at hiding my emotions what if they ever asked me that and i did have a girl and i wasn't out. Sorry for the length Merry Belated Christmas and Have a great week.


cherryredlipgloss's picture

Wow. Long post. Hope things g

Wow. Long post. Hope things get better :)
Broken hearts, and forgotten names....
Will this ever end?

devildog's picture

:( That sucks, I hope your fa

:( That sucks, I hope your family becomes more accepting.


I find there's glamour
In being a wallflower
With a stammer
I love what I am
And you won't change me
So take me how I am