Crushed

sporty15890's picture

My mom told me today that now that she knows I'm gay it's like I'm not the same, and I have died (exact words) I don't know what to do. I agreed to go to counseling, and even opened up to my parents a little bit. But my mom has just mentally bashed me back, whether or not she is doing it on purpose. I feel like I don't matter anymore; my existence is nothing. Why can't I just be who they want me to be, I hate myself for being different, I've made them ashamed. I feel like there is nothing I can do to satisfy them now.

Comments

devildog's picture

How could she say that to you

How could she say that to you?! Alright, here's my two cents-fuck them. There is no reason for you to be ashamed of yourself, this is part of who you are and you should have the right to be happy and love yourself. Too many people, myself included, feel like they're obligated to please their parents at their own expense. It shouldn't be that way, don't let them hurt you and lower your self-esteem. You can tell them exactly how you feel, and if they don't respond, at least in a few years you'll be on your own and independent from them. Just hang in there, and don't let them get you down! It's' your life, not theirs.

~*~*~*~*~*~

I’m not as sad as Doestoevsky,
I’m not as clever as Mark Twain,
I’ll only buy a book for the way it looks,
And I'll stick it on the shelf again.
-Belle and Sebastian

co0kiEs n CreAm's picture

hmm...

---- Dont try and over rule your heart, its madness to try ----

hey, im just slightly new at this oasismag thing here but heres wat i gotta say...i know shes ur mother and her opinion counts (maybe) and she has every right to tell u what to do...BUT NEVER ever EVER about what u really are inside. its you man...u should know u better that ANYONE else in this god forsaken world. ok go to counselling, but if u know who and what u are already, well then whats the point? the shrink is prolly only going to tell u what u already know anyway (considering thats what they always do). and dont feel like u dont matter anymore sweetie...bcoz we havent been given this life...our life...for nothing! if they call themselves ur parents...they should be able to build a bridge and get over it. See ya 'round!