Advice from Suffragettecity

OasisOut's picture

Like just about every other gay guy, I was drawn to boys since early childhood, but I had my sexual awakening when I entered puberty at 12.

For some strange reason, despite other students' constantly calling me a "fag" and often seeming to want nothing to do with me, I didn't really see myself as different from everyone else; my homoerotic and often effeminate demeanor came naturally to me.

I didn't really know what "gay" and "fag" meant, except that they were considered a bad thing from which I should distance myself. Thus, through my sixth grade and most of my seventh grade years, I would flirt with other boys and behave in an effeminate manner without knowing why many other boys were so mean to me. After all, I believed wholeheartedly that I wasn't one of those icky gay people I kept hearing about.

But midway through my seventh grade year, it suddenly dawned on me: I was indeed one of them. Being a Catholic at the time, my reaction was pretty negative, and even though I would soon abandon Catholicism, I was driven into a period of denial that would last four years, even though I would remain sexually inactive for that entire time.

At 17, I finally came out to myself. A year later, I came out my parents. And shortly after that, I finally had my first relationship with another boy.

Today, I'm out to almost everybody, the exception being most of my workmates.

Age: 23
Sex: male
Location: Muncie, Indiana, USA

Comments

RainbowTime's picture

avoided me too

when i was young too most of the girls avoided me too because i was too Boyish and then later on i did have a few friends i was constily called a Dyke and a Lesbian but most people just thought i was a tomboy when i came out didn't surprise people

i only drink irn bru and the occassional blood of my enemies