Another of my entries with a pointless title.

Uncertain's picture

Harlo everybody. It's been a while since I posted two jounrnal entries on the same week.

It's late, and dad isn't in a very good mood since he's worked until now and just got home... so I'll just keep everything compacted.

Okido, I finally got my eye shadow! *Tap dances around the room* I was very disappointed that I couldn't get the colour I wanted, which was light purple and black. I happened to get a set of light blue, navy and grey. I had to buy it myself which costed $260 NT (no idea how to convert to US currency, but it's about NZ$11). I decided not to use much of it yet... and only use it on occasion. Since, if I used it now... I'd only be showing it to randoms on the street that I will only probably see once in my lifetime, and also only my dad, sister, and brother which totally disapproves of it from the start. That would be pointless and a waste.

Before we bought it, dad asked if I wanted to 'borrow' his friend's wife's to try it out. I was willing to, but I was guessing that I'd lose my chance to buy it if I missed my chance now. I told him I was determined to wear it so I bought it. After we got into the car, he said to me "I know you teenagers like being different or wierd, but in the end you still have to return to what is natural. What do you think people will think about a guy using make up?"

I could easily rebutt his question, but I kept silent. I thought that this is what my natural self is... I'm doing what feels right for myself. Secondly, I won't give shit about what people think about me, at least to those who think negatively of me on how I look.

Okido, so today my mum took us (my sis and I) out again. She was being the same ignorant person she is. Not just about my sexuality, but about anything she says. Because I eat alot, we were ordering food... and she always order stuff she doesn't eat. I told her she has to eat the stuff she ordered, she said she would but she didn't. This was lunch, and I finished what she didn't finish (I honestly hate seeing food wasted). I became rather full, and when it got to dinner time, she did the same thing. And this is when I snapped at her.

Okay, I don't have time to go into more detail on that. Dad is already telling everyone off. He already told me to get off the computer and he's making the whole atmosphere tense. However, I wanted to finish this entry.

Okay, so we set out on our way home afterwards. My mum was talking to my Aunt in the car, and they were talking about their sexist mother not giving them any of her estate. Then my mum had to involve me in the conversation (like always), and said that "I know Max would treat his sons and daughters he has the same (the mandarin way she referred to the children had two meanings, one means blood-related or the other means given birth to)". I remained silent, but I could've said something like "Men don't give birth to children'", or simply said "What happens if I won't have children at all?". However, I didn't have the chance because she interupted herself right after. We got home, he told me to hug her before she left, I didn't and walked upstairs because I was angry with her. Maybe I should have... I duno.

Okay, dad is being furious than ever now. He's taking it out on my brother right now. I can feel soon it'll come to me. If I don't hurry I might not even get the chance to post this, or tomorrow, or the day after... because I'm going to see a ice skating show throught the weekend.

Okay, I saw Lowell's entry about him going to move to Tokyo... I was very surprised, and I hope he would fit in well. I really do hope that. However, I don't have time to write down how I feel more deeply. I simply have no time. I'd just like to address the issue.

Oh, and also, I talked to Beibei today, after not being able to talk to him for so long. It was great talking to him after a long while.

Also talked to Milly today. I'll copy paste the conversation we had in any case to save time. No time for explanations on what happened - I'll just say I thought the conversation was funny. This is a part of our conversation:

《 Screwed 》 - Oh shizzle...


Kang Lin's picture

Yay for makeup ^_^

I would get some eyeliner, but I'm not competent enough to apply it...

Was the "Do you have a boyfriend?" question a language barrier thing? The lack of distinction between "friend (male)" and "boyfriend" in some languages is so useful when reporting back on events to language teachers :p

raining men's picture

Nice eyeliner

Nice sounding eyeliner by the way

"Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suf-fer-ing"

devildog's picture

IM conversations are so funny

IM conversations are so funny:). I do that with my sister too-the part about the boyfriends was priceless!

I'm sorry you're having a rough time with your parents, I hope things get better. And that sounds like nice eyeshadow-I'm anxious to see how people back in NZ will react:). Your friends conversations always crack me up.


I find there's glamour
In being a wallflower
With a stammer
I love what I am
And you won't change me
So take me how I am