i was think last night about coming otu to at least my friends and no-one else. I also thought of coming otu to my parents about being bi, when i got in trouble for an e-friend calling me dad said, "Don't hide stuff from us, just tell us." Well i really really want to, but I don't want to get shunned, or throw out, even though I think they will take it well, I know of one gay guy at our school I want to talk about this to but I don't know him very well and I'm afraid of talking to anyone. Major homo-haters down here. I feel like I am hiding my true self and I am always in a state of paranoia. People used to pick on me in elementry school b/c my last name is Gay. It is annoying. No-one does it much anymore. I'm am really confused about what to do. At church this morning, our preacher preached abotu testing spirits. Liek the spirits that tell ppl they are fat. I thought maybe this is a spirit. I also thought about ppl saying it was a choice, but yeah it is a choice, but a choice to follow feelings.And I have tried but these feelings wont go away. I dunno what to do, I'm really scared, scared of mom accidentaly finding out and then what, what would I do? GRRRRRRR, why is this so hard.