i need some support

Cody Emit's picture

my given name is erika and everyone still calls me by it. my mother thinks i'm a freak,
the kids at school beat up on me. i recently had to break iy off with my thearipst
because he thinks he can "cure" me of my transgenderism, and to top it all off i may have cacer.
i feellike the universe is just takeing a big shit on me. i recently got sober. ihad a severe drug poblem for a long tie. i had one year on the first. i felt like my life was really turning around, then i went in for a ruetine check up and got blood drawn. they found abnormalities and ordered more tests. i have extremely high levels of testostorone and other protiens. i may have cancer. ii'm scared and i don't know what to do. i could really use some help. nothing speacil, just anything you feel might help. i'm scared. i don't know what to do.

Patch's picture

First off, find a new therapi

First off, find a new therapist. Second of all, we often have great trials in our lives because once we get over them, we become wiser, stronger people. It sounds like you got it really hard. But don't give up hope.

Here is something I found that might make you feel a bit better (maybe):

READ THIS WHOLE THING. IT'S SO DANG TRUE* 1. At least 2 people in this world love you so much they would die for you. 2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way. 3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you. 4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you. 5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep. 6. You mean the world to someone. 7. If not for you, someone may not be living. 8. You are special and unique. 9. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you. 10. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it. 11. When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a look: you most likely turned your back on the world. 12. When you think you have no chance of getting what you want, you probably won't get it, but if you believe in yourself, probably, sooner or later, you will get it. 13. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks. 14. Always tell someone how you feel about them; you will feel much better when they know. 15. If you have a great friend, take the time to let them know that they are great.

Anyways, I am here for you if you wanna talk about anything.

"What is the purpose of life? It is to live it."

RainbowCommie's picture

Just remember- people love you and care about you.

I don't know if you're taking hormones, but if your therapist isn't accepting, then you're probably not taking them under a doctor's supervision. Again, I don't know whether you are, but that could explain the high testosterone.
Don't forget that you matter. The kids at school only hate you because they're ignorant, because bigotry and stupidity have blinded them to the wonderful person you are. You don't need them- there are better people who do accept you. I realize that this might not help if they're beating up on you, but remember that in a few more years, you'll be out of high school and won't have to see them ever again.
About the possible cancer, it's just that- a possibility. Even if you are diagnosed, you can still live a full, satisfying life- some people recover from it entirely, and thousands are misdiagnosed. Just because the preliminary tests indicate a problem doesn't mean that it's certain, or even likely, that cancer's there.
Again, never forget that you matter. People care about you, your friends care about you, I care about you.

Change is the only constant.
Even if you win the race, you're still a rat.
Workers of the world unite: you have nothing but your chains to lose, and you have a world to win.
Direct Action!

Bionicslim's picture

i dont know your religion, bu

i dont know your religion, but have faith in God. Hold strong, and hold to the faith you know. He will work it out. Wish I was there to help.