i'm new here and need friends who i can talk to without getting hurt...

gothic_gay_boi013's picture

hi, i'm chad.. im a gay FTM and i am to afraid to come out
and tell people close to me about it for fear or pain and
humiliation.. i am looking for some people that have dealt with
this situation before.. no one truly understands me and im trying
to reach out to someone.. please help me.. i could use a good
friendship..

thanks,
Chad

xxcarebeargirlxx's picture

well i don't kno what it's li

well i don't kno what it's like to be a trans. but i do kno what it's like ot be gay, and come out. and i think it is sorta the same.but then very different at the same time. Well i gues si'll start by saying hello,and asking..what do ur freinds/family/peers all think about this sort of stuff?

gothic_gay_boi013's picture

trouble at home

grandma is a baptised mormon...i dont think i have
any gay relatives.. my mom has a few gay friends
dad is kinda looks through a one sided mirror and
makes jokes and says nasty things inside it hurts
badly but i am afraid to tell any of them..

hanging in there,
Chad

Cleopatra's picture

i have felt that too

but i'm a bi, not a gay. but i experienced the same thing too. you see, my community doesn't accept gays(even bisexuals), so i was forced to remain in the closet for 5 years. it's been really tough and hard not to show others who i really am, and i could not tell anybody how i felt for another person (esp if that person's a girl), so i just had a journal to write my thoughts and feelings on..is this how you feel too?

well, last year, i have started coming out to some very close friends. some took it well, some didn't. but why would i care for those who didn't take it well?? it proved that they are not my real friends. now, i'm still deciding whether to tell my bestfriend about it or not..it's difficult to tell something to someone you have know so well.. also, my parents don't know that i'm a bi. i wouldnt risk myself getting 'guillotined'(if there's such a word) by them!haha!
coming out is really a nice feeling, but you really have to have tons of guts and courage to do that. but you have to ask yourself if you're ready or not. based from experience, when you keep on procrastinating, you loose some courage and guts you have already mustered. so, if you think you're already ready, then go for it!

if you need someone to talk to, feel free to pm me ;)

you have to take risks...we will only understand the miracle of life fully if we allow the unexpected to happen- paulo coelho

gothic_gay_boi013's picture

you got msn messenger by chan

you got msn messenger by chance??

well drop me a line sometime..

ttyl,
Chad

Cleopatra's picture

none...just yahoo messenger..

but we can talk through private messages. it's if you just want someone to talk to ;)
you have to take risks...we will only understand the miracle of life fully if we allow the unexpected to happen- paulo coelho

gothic_gay_boi013's picture

im actually transgender... F

im actually transgender...
FTM..
im a gay male trapped in a females body...
i havent found many others like me..

confused,
Chad

my heart it pitter patters's picture

i know how you feel. i was te

i know how you feel. i was terrified of coming out for a very long time, afraid of how it would effect my family, friends, everyone. and then there was the worry of what people would do to me...so when i first came out (after months of worry) it was as bi, i figured that would lessen the blow for everyone, including myself, but i felt guilty. i'm a lesbian and i wanted people to know, i didn't want to be hiding, and it was hurting me. just recently i have begun coming out as gay. so far people have actually taken it better than when i came out as bisexual.

my opinion is, come out. it will, inevitably, hurt. it hurts for almost everyone; there will always be people who aren't going to take it well, always. the thing is, when you come out, you have to be sure you're in a mindspace where it's ok, and make sure you have people you can turn to for support. if you have this, coming out is worth the pain. the sense of liberation, of freedom that comes with it is amazing; you can finally be who you are!! imagine that...
-tink

ps. if you ever, ever need someone to talk to, write me. i'll always be here.

once time is lit, it will burn whether or not you're breathing it in. even after smoke becomes air there is the memory of smoke. -david levithan

Hyacinthus's picture

Hi

Hi chad,
I'm gay too and I understand completely where you are coming from. I began came out to my friends and family at the beginning of this year and I'm still telling people. The best thing to remember is that if these people really love you, then they will accept you. Yes, some people take time to adjust, and yes, you might loose some people. But if they leave you then just remember that it doesn't neccessarily mean that they don't love you, it usually just means that they just can't accept you. Nevertheless if they can't accept you then they're not good people to be around. Always remember that you are a unique and beautiful person that should never let people get you down!
~Frenchie

P.S. Hey if you still want to talk just send a message.

"The French are glad to die for love, they delight in fighting duels. But I like a man who lives, and gives expensive jewels"