The lesbian story

victoria2995's picture

ok well i have worked really hard on this story and I would like to know it its good or not and please do not lie and tell me what I lack or am good at. im sorry the chapters arnt long but i have to do that but still please read this story here it is :

Chapter One :I tell her

I,v known for a long time that I am a lesbian, I decided I should tell my best friend. My sister already knew and was OK with it. On a Friday after school I decided to tell her on instant messanger. When I told her all she said was "I,m a little mad you didn't tell me sooner but we got all that worked out. That monday I found out she told our friend bailey I was a lesbian without my permission. I didn't get mad because she was ok with it.

Chapter Two : Lexi & Megan

I met this girl named lexiand I really liked her she was cute, smart, and funny. We spent alot of time together. It seemed like she liked my sister better though... but she kept telling me she didn't but I didn't belive her. My sister, Tabby and her brother, Tyler started dating. My sister shared her first kiss with him and I shared mine with lexi, we were playing spin the bottle.

Well she started hangin' out with megan whom I later developed a crush on. I kept hearing that megan was a lesbian, so I kept thinking we would start dating. But my best friend who I mentioned erlier. Dni, told her that I liked her and so megan called me a nasty lesbo. I eventually got over it.

One day me and Dani were talking about a school called Rex and she said "Rex is so gay" right in front of me. One time she said "two girls together is just wrong" and then she said "I saw to lesbos kissing". Thats when I cracked. Later that night I called her and said "if you think being a lesbian is bad than we cant be friends. She said " fine you lesbo" then I hung up on her. she kept saying thngs like that for a long time then she said she was really sorry. I didn't accept her apoligie. Later on I found out that Dani and Bailey set me up. But she was actually sorry.

But then I read my E-mail and she said some REALLY mean things. Two weeks after that we were still fighting and she said "I,m moving tonight and I need to know do you forgive me?" I said "no I don't" and I walked away.

(this part of the story is now after she moved and it is a few years later and in presant tense)

Chatper 3: High school

Im now in my last year of high school. I have almost forgotten all about dani. So now I dont think she is ever coming back. But now I see her walk past me I spin around and look again. I ask " are you dani mirker?" she says "yeah but how would you know me I just came here today". so now I say "I,m Jessica" she says "jessica? you mean jessica the lesbian?". So I reply " yeah I am still a lesbian and i,m suprised you didnt say 'oh your that nasty lesbo'". The bell for my next class rings and I start walking and dani follows and says "look about before I-" I inturrupt her and say " nothing needs to be said about that". There are only a few other kids in the hall with us now. she now says "so you forgive me!!?".We are the only ones in the hall now. I am at the door to my class And I say very rudly " no I don't " now Dani stands their alone in tha hall with a tear streaming down her face.

Chapter Four: The club

that night I am now at a club dancing with my girlfriend when Dani walks in. She stares at me for a monent. Than she walks up to me grabs my arm pulling me she says " I need to talk to you privatly". She pulls me into a corner and says "look I am really sorry". I say "But you were the one who thought being a lesbian was bad". she says " I was stupid to think that and I am a lesbian" I ask "really?". I say "I better get back to my girl friend". I walk off and she grabs my arm and says "forget her i love you". We kiss passionitly and then I say "I don't think i should be doing this but I love you two". My girlfriend walks up and says " YOUR CHEATING ON ME?!". I say " I-" she inturrupts and says "DONT BOTHER" she then storms off and me and Dani end up together.

Comments

EGLolita's picture

Personally, I feel like this

Personally, I feel like this is either a summary of what happened in the story or its a written way of trying to tell somebody what happened.
My best advice is maybe read some fanfictions and practice writing some of your own, focusing on lots and lots of detail. You've got a good plotline, but you might start with taking one of these incidents and focusing on the events and what exactly happened and the emotions that came of it.
I'd be happy to help if you want any.
~My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies
Fairy tales of yesterday will grow but never die
I can fly, my friend~ Queen

Anonymous's picture

wow i think it was really goo

wow i think it was really good...u should make more of those....:)

A DREAM IS A WISH UR HEART MAKES!!!!!