So yesterday my dad became the first member of my family to know I'm gay. I gave him a poem for Father's Day and at the end told him I'm gay. First he thought it was some type of joke but I had to tell him it wasn't. He thought I didn't even write it because "it's not how I write." He hasn't even read any of my writing, how can he say that? He didn't get mad or anything, so that's good. I knew he wouldn't. He thinks that I'm too young to know such things. If I told him I was dating a girl, he wouldn't say I was too young. He'd say congratulations. I believe that I'm mature enough to know what my own preferences are. Guys at school are attracted to girls and they aren't half as mature as I am. They haven't even started growing hair on their chin while I've been shaving for years. I don't think maturity is an issue. But he is my father so I'm going to heed his advice and keep my mind open just in case I do change. I seriously doubt it though, considering I've been feeling this way for years and I have other traits of a gay guy such as 90% of my friends being girls and being more effeminate than most guys. I'm pretty sure I'm a homo!
My dad also said that I am who I am so he's being accepting of it and that's a good thing. He also said we could talk about it sometime so that's good times two. I don't know if I want to talk about it more just yet though. I'm still kind of recovering from the shock of the fact that I gained the courage to tell him. My blood was boiling so hot when I put my hand under cold water it felt warm. As for other family members, I'm just going to wait until I feel comfortable and ready to tell them. It may be tomorrow or next year, who knows? But I've made an important step in becoming fully out. I long for the day when I can be completely myself. No more secrets, no more lies, no more keeping thoughts inside. Just me.