Happy Father's Day, I'm gay!

msquared's picture

So yesterday my dad became the first member of my family to know I'm gay. I gave him a poem for Father's Day and at the end told him I'm gay. First he thought it was some type of joke but I had to tell him it wasn't. He thought I didn't even write it because "it's not how I write." He hasn't even read any of my writing, how can he say that? He didn't get mad or anything, so that's good. I knew he wouldn't. He thinks that I'm too young to know such things. If I told him I was dating a girl, he wouldn't say I was too young. He'd say congratulations. I believe that I'm mature enough to know what my own preferences are. Guys at school are attracted to girls and they aren't half as mature as I am. They haven't even started growing hair on their chin while I've been shaving for years. I don't think maturity is an issue. But he is my father so I'm going to heed his advice and keep my mind open just in case I do change. I seriously doubt it though, considering I've been feeling this way for years and I have other traits of a gay guy such as 90% of my friends being girls and being more effeminate than most guys. I'm pretty sure I'm a homo!

My dad also said that I am who I am so he's being accepting of it and that's a good thing. He also said we could talk about it sometime so that's good times two. I don't know if I want to talk about it more just yet though. I'm still kind of recovering from the shock of the fact that I gained the courage to tell him. My blood was boiling so hot when I put my hand under cold water it felt warm. As for other family members, I'm just going to wait until I feel comfortable and ready to tell them. It may be tomorrow or next year, who knows? But I've made an important step in becoming fully out. I long for the day when I can be completely myself. No more secrets, no more lies, no more keeping thoughts inside. Just me.

Comments

Hyacinthus's picture

Well

Well i'm glad you had the courage to tell your father, and especially glad that he accepted you so easily! Congrats! As for his "too young" speech, don't worry about it. He's just worried about you, and I think deep down he knows this is who you really are. He just needs time to adjust to that fact. I hope the rest of your coming out experience goes as well!

"Persuasive speech, and more persuasive sighs,
Silence that spoke, and eloquence of eyes."
- The Iliad (bk. XX, l. 315), (Bryant's translation)

kassieib's picture

good for you

It was very brave of you to tell your father. It is always best to eventually involve your family because they love you no matter what you are and should be there to support you.

frizzfro45's picture

My mom told me the same thing

My mom told me the same thing when i told her, actually, she told me that i was sexually attracted to a stop sign, so, I think that it is just the first defense, your dad, and my mom say they don't mind if we are gay, or in my case, bi, but in all reality, they don't want us too, just because they don't want us to have to deal with all the idiots out there, who are homophobic, they really do still love us, no matter what, but just don't want us to deal with the cruelty of ppl, they are just looking out for us. But, congrats at telling your dad, and getting it out there.

If you're gonna jump, then jump far
If you're gonna be a singer, then u better be a rockstar
If you're gonna be a driver, then u better drive a race car
If you're gonna hit the high notes, then u better be a diva
go all the way, or go home

Panic Motion's picture

La Familia.

Congo Rats! I envy you for being able to tell family first.

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Disney's picture

That's 100% totally awesome!

That's 100% totally awesome! I can't imagine telling my dad atm! I think every GLBT person in the closet feels te same way as the last part of your journal describes. Even though lying can be fun or helpful, a lot of the time just being able to be yourself is what we all want, especially when surrounded by teens or others that are acting exactly as they want to and not bieing criticized for it or anything.

-J, boy, gay and 16 all the way. Just not out to anyone yet. I guess my sig could use some work.

miss-understood's picture

...

what a shame your gay... thats horrible your gay coz ure kinda cute lol. Ahh parents parents parents. Cant live with em cant live with out them! Hate parental reactions, hope it works out for ya.