damn. i'm like buzzin rite now lol. so i'm feelin good, but its sucks that tomorrow i'm gonna feel all the pain and stuff again. at least though, i can forget about everything tonite. NOT! damn. i'm like all feeling good but i still think about everything thats happened & it sucks 'cause it took a long time for me to put all my feelings and stuff away to a lil place i wasn't ever gonna open again, but NO. it all came out again now i'm paying for it. yup yup. but fuck it all i don't care rite now. wait til tomorrow. i just cant deal with all this shit anymore, my body can't take it either. i'm kinda getting sick i think, i've been having big ass headaches lately & its so bad i feel really sick and can't do things. idk whats going on but its not good.
damn. i'm hoping maybe i can be able to deal with all this crap and go back to my old self, my friend is kinda freaking out on me 'cause i'm kinda the one that always worries about other people and help them out and now i'm all fucked up and she's on like "panic mode" 'cause i'm the most unlikliest person to have breakdowns. but what she doesn't really know; is that i'm really good at hiding things. i'd rather be helping other people then have people help me and make me feel weak & helpless. i hate that feeling 'cause i'd rather do things myself other than other people.
well. i'm about to knock out soon lol. thanks to anyone who was actually reading this. and if it doesn't make sense then i'm so sorry, but i'm not really "here" rite now lol. so yea. thanx again :)