My parents...

Riku's picture

My parents are splitting up or something. I knew it was going to happen. But when it did I was so scared that I was going to end up in foster care. But the police actually helped... They must have because when I got back (I went outside because I couldn't deal with it.) everyone had calmed down. And my dad was letting my mom leave with my sister. We don't know what's going to happen yet. But I'm just glad that my dad isn't acting suicidal anymore. I knew the only person he'd hurt would be himself. But I get worried about him you know? Both of my parents are a little insane I guess, my mom has a few anger management problems. She ends up hurting people when she gets angry, and she dosen't want to. Which is why she won't talk to my dad, because she dosn't want to end up hurting him. (She is a wonderful woman though. But my grandparents are probably to blame for any problems my mom has. They aren't exactly the greatest people around. (I know, I shouldn't be saying this about them. But..)) And my dad wants to talk to her. And he keeps misunderstanding her and getting worked up over it, and he takes everything personally. And yesterday he did his "your dad is dead, I'm someone else" thing which was strange, though I understand his reasons. But I guess nobody is truly normal, and everyone has their faults. I mean I have a half brother is so autisic that he can't even speak. (besides a couple words, but I love him anyways. And it's werid because, you can tell when he's trying to talk, and he can't. And he understands the rest of us when we talk.)

But I'm not worried about my parents anymore. It seems like they're going to come to some conclusion, mabye my mom will stay, mabye she won't. I know she needs someone with her, but my dad does too. So my sister and I are split up for now. After everything gets worked out we'll probably be moving back and fourth. But as long as I live near where I do now I don't really care. Someone important is here.

I've always known that I'm way different. Mabye it's because I'm a "mutt" or something, I don't know most of my heritage, and I have tan skin and a russian nose and don't fit in anywhere. Mabye it's because I'm lesbian, mabye it's my synesthisia, or my dyslexia, mabye it's some weird disorder thats sitting around in my head waiting for a name. I wouldn't be surprised.

Sometimes I wish I wasn't so weird, sometimes I wish I was just a "normal" girl, who got A's and B's, (As opposed to As and Ds. X_X) and actually went to a public school, and could actually stand public school without going insane... Or correcting the teachers all of the time. And looked at boys... Not girls. And didn't "see" colors everytime she heard something, felt something, or smelt something. Or have any of my senses mixed at all. But. I know I'll never be like that. Sometimes I'm ok with who I am. But I just don't know.

On the other hand, I've been having trouble thinking of what to draw latley. So I'm taking this 100 themes challenge, which will hopefully help. But so far I've only drawn one picture and that took like 4 hours. So it's going to be a while. But hopefully, I'll improve this way. And plus, it sounds fun. Mabye I'll actually finish too, wouldn't that be nice?

Comments

raining men's picture

Aye

Yeah my parents are now finally getting divorced. Well my dad is dorvicing my mum (under u.k law after 5 years of separation one person can just divorce the other - although I thought they'd been separated 6 years).
In your case the ending of the marriage doesn't sound like a very bad thing. Many people, especially your dad seemed to be sufering uner it, if you can get through the temporary depression it sounds like it might be better for him. Then again, maybe not

"Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suf-fer-ing"

scandalboy's picture

sometimes it's for the best

sometimes it's better for two people to spilt rather that making each other extremely unhappy. my mum left my dad a MONTH after i got back from a month in china last year, and my dad sinked into deep, deep depression, and although he is much better now, and he still has bouts of it. be strong, sweetie.

Is that a female impersonator?
Of what?