*tear

greenmind's picture

So it's 12:20 and I am at this point again. I don't feel good about where my life is, or where it is going. I feel like I have all these handicaps and obsticles holding me down. I was talking to Maggie early this morning and talking to her helped me, but again I feel the same shit.
My parents are divorced, good for them.
I feel I am depressed once again. The other things on my list, I don't feel comfortable listing or discussing at this time.
*sigh* I'm forced to live with my dad, he is making me live with him because he says he can't think of living without seeing his three kids. I hate that I did it, I really really do. But a whole back my mom asked me to delete a microsoft word document that she had written about my parent's married relationship, like nothing graphic or anything like that. But of course I couldn't not read it. It entailed all the horrible things my father had done to my mother in the PAST MONTH! It was three pages I think, I didn't even read it all and now I hate my father for it. You can't do what you did in that document and be the kind of father he is. He is truly Jackel and Hyde. And no one has noticed my odd behavior, I go to bed only after 4 in the morning and make my own meals, do my own laundry.
I am a different person when I'm with my mom, when I'm with her. I'm actually happy. That makes me so sad to say that my life has actually come to that. I dread coming to his house and no way in fucking hell would he ever let me stay at my mother's house full time.

Comments

mags15's picture

i'm glad that you say i helpe

i'm glad that you say i helped some, i felt as is i wasen't helping at all or making a difference, i thought about it alot last night and you are not burdening me when you ask for my help. I really do care for you and want to help as much as i can, i'm always here to listen whenever you need me to. -hugs-