I haven't written a journal entry in a long time. Well, not that long, but considering how often I used to at summer, I'd say it's been awhile. Why's that? Well, firstly becoz of my exams. Yep, I still have a long way to go, but I'm doing good. Till now, I think I've passed all of them. The other reason though is because there's nothing I feel like saying. I feel fine! Note that, because it's rare...
Yep, I'm good. I don't even care I have to study till mid-October. I'm good, I'm really good. No issues, no wanna-slash-my-wrists moments, no why-am-I-gay-damn-it feelings... Just good. It feels nice, and weird. I've never felt that OK with myself before.
Yesterday I met a gay guy. I mean, completely-out guy. He was somewhat cute (almost), anyway if I had the courage I would go for him. But I was with Evangeline and she doesn't know. If it were Lilah, she woulda helped me out, I bet. But it's good. I'm still thinking of that guy at the ship, the guy I had a moment with. I can't get him out of my mind! He was so damn beautiful (and mind that I use the word 'beautiful' only for cases of 100% beauty, I'm difficult)!!! I can't get him out of my head!
At least I don't feel guilty I want him. A few-months-ago me would be in denial right now.