Hooo.....I AM GAY! Its just uncontrollable now with not being in high school and having to constantly monitor myself. I can't stop checking out girls, I'm starting to feel like such a perv! I'm getting so I don't really care if people suspect though(except family!) I still would rather not be gay, but I feel much more comfortable now that I have accepted that I can't change it.
Its weird because I'm not attracted to guys at all, but if a guy flirts with me I'll flirt back. I think its just a reation (I've only just started doing this recently too). Then I feel bad for flirting back, even though hes probably just looking to "get some". But I feel like I'm leading them on. It freaks me out too! Haha! If I flirt back with a guy and then he actually starts making moves on me, it just gets me off guard and then I have to find an excuse or something to get away. Its hard to tell when a guy is hitting on you or when hes just being nice.....Its a dangerous thing! People have to tell me if they think a guy is interested in me. I can't tell....probably because I don't care! Thats probably why it catches me off guard! I have only been semi-sort-of hit on by one girl and she was drunk (and probably high on something) So I don't know whats up with girl flirting yet.