bratalamay's picture

okay, so this is basically whats going on in the life of me. im still in love with a boy at my school (i know more about him than he does about me. isnt that weird? like, i know how to spell his name (first and last), i know his birthday (this friday, actually), i know what his locker number is, i know he plays the trombone in band, i know he's number 86 on the middle-weight football team at school, etc.....). and im having fun with this because almost every day, we end up catching the other one's eye and just stare for, like, 30 seconds before either of us can look away. its awesome. i cant help swooning at the sight of him. and this is okay for me because ive finally come to accept the fact that i like guys as well as girls (for those of you who are total blanks right now, for a while i really didnt want to like guys because i wanted to be a lesbain, but i like being bi now...more options ;-).

the last girl who completely dumped me (in more ways than one (see last journal)) is now pissed off at me for telling people that shes bi. im going to break off for a min. to tell that story:

okay, so one day at lunch, we're outside waiting to go in, when the group of girls who regularly make fun of me comes up to me and says "is it true you asked T* out last year?" im like "yeah" (because its not like i was going to lie about it). and they go "but she said no right?" im like, "uh, no. she said yes" (because she DID). and they're like "yeah right. shut up. shes not a lesbian" im like "youre right, she not. shes bi". and i felt bad for telling people when she asked me not to, but they didnt believe me anyway, and now everyone thinks im talking shit about her. so then after school, her best friend A* comes up to me in my bus line and is all "what the f*** is your f***ing problem??? why are you saying that T said yes to you asking her out last year??? she not a lesbian!! youre a f***ing bitch!!!" and she stormed off. so just then my bus pulled up and while i was walking toward it w/ my friend, i walk right past T, and she turns around and flips me off (expected) and PUNCHES me in the arm (unexpected)!!! anyway, back to my current life.....

the people who i usually hang out with and sit with at lunch keep filling up all the spots at the table except one which they tell me is "reserved", so ive finally figured it out that they dont care about me one bit and i have no idea why they claim to be my friends.

my best friend R*, i just found out today, wants to play and sing the same song that i want to sing for the talent show. this makes me really upset because i know im going to be the one backing off and letting her sing, while i end up singing the song my parents want me to sing, JUST to make HER happy. oh well....

im very lazy and i hate homework so the counselor wants to put me in homework club. -gag-

on a lighter note, ive written many poems lately (i will post them later ;-), and two of them were in spanish. so i showed them to my spanish teacher (im, like, the TOP DOG in spanish class (only person in the ENTIRE school who got 100%, 100/100 questions RIGHT on the spanish final last year ;-) and he liked them so much, he put them up in the spanish room *smiles from warm fuzzy feeling from admiration*.

*exhale* PHEW! long entry, huh? oh well. anyway, speaking of procrastination, i got homework to do, lol.

LOVE ALL YOU GUYS AND GALS (oh, and you too, adam LMAO)!!!!!

Your FAVORITE Oasis member (besides jeff :-P ),
Jae Jae

(P.S. *= names shortened to initials to protect the innocent ;-)


ForeverEndedToday's picture

Friends and school are so com

Friends and school are so complicated its best just not to think about it. Now that i know your awesome at spanish dont be suprised if i randomly ask for help on homework now lol jk. Its good that you didnt lie about it being honest with people is the best thing to do regardless of the consequences. Ill make sure i check out some of your poetry when you post it.

"Who says that there's a soul?
Just let me be..."