UPDATE

808Chik's picture

Sigh. Yeah its been too long...3 months that i haven't been on too much problems plus...i was grounded from the computer. Well to update i went out with the girl that i had my date with (my ex) for those who read those posts. We had fun...it was love...but it was all a secret, my family couldn't find out because i knew that they wouldn't accept it...accept me. But i got caught and from there all the lies and sneaking around came around and bit me in the ass...badly. They found out about her and had her some to my house where my auntie (the "Enforcer") strictly set down the rule that there was to be NO CONTACT whatsoever. WHAT? i know, it was so hard sitting across from the love of my life cry and me myself sitting still with no emotion, so much things running through my mind when i should stood up and told her how i felt but NO i was an asshole and i paid for it.

We talked still, she picked me up still...just a second with her was all i needed to get through the day but then i found out that she cheated on me with one of my friends...ONE OF MY FRIENDS someone i learned to trust but fucking betrayed me...she said it was nothing and that she thought we were over because of what had happened at my house, i didn't even show anything so she thought it was over...GOD the tears i cried but eventually we talked and i gave her another chance. Surprised the fuck outta everyone especially my so-called friend...why?...'cause she wanted my gf, she would call her up and ask her out even if we were still together...how fucked up is that? she even told her to break up with me...made me so pissed, she was lucky she decided to go to online school 'cause i wasn't happy and i'm not a fighter but damn you mess with me idk what you'll get.

Ah love...we got through the first two months of barely seeing eachother and talking to each other...our love the only thing keeping us together. then slowly by slowly i got my own phone then got to go out a lil only with the permission of my dad, who is the only one that understands me and accepts me for who i am...but damn everytime things get good something always has to go bad right? sigh i spilled my heart for her told her all the things i was feeling then...an ex of mine that dumped me because she didn't have time for me, but ended up going back out with her ex fucked up yea?...well she called me up and asked me to go to Winterball with her...of course i said NO and i told me gf but she got mad 'cause i talked to her...OMG is it right that she could talk to all her ex's and even hang out with them and I CAN'T? it pissed me off...so things got rocky with us no phone calls, one word texts...

God it hurt...night after night day after day...i cried my eyes out...couldn't sleep couldn't eat...my body was getting fucked up...i was unhappy...so then one night...the night of our 3 month anniversary...it all ended...my life has finally ended...why? she said she needed time to get through things and maybe we can get together again after...WHAT? fuck...well its been 3 days since that happened and yesterday i was looking around and i think there's someone else...god why couldn't she tell me rather than make me feel like there's hope? huh just fucking come out to me and say "THERE'S SOMEONE ELSE" it'll hurt yeah but at least i know the truth...