Hello peoples. Hmm I'm not really sure what I want to write about. There is nothing unusual happening with
me right now, just the usual run of the mill stuff, but I'm feeling a bit lonely and figured I'd make a
I miss my friends right now, well I say "friends" but I really mean one friend in particular who makes me
feel all warm and fuzzy inside. I know I have to just get over her because, lets face it, it just aint ever
going to happen. I have been seeing less of her over the last few weeks, which makes me :( because I miss
talking to her everyday. Its like I have to just get over her, but I don't want to drift away from her
either. I just don't know. I just feel all lonely right now.
I sort of just feel like I am not that close to anyone anymore. I still have lots of friends and all that,
but I feel like I have shut them out of my actual life. Like the general stuff of what is going on with me.
Its like I have gotten used to pretending life is sweet and everything is fine with me. I am always the
funny one in the group that everything is fine with,and that person that everyone seems to come to with
their problems,and don't get me wrong I like helping people but sometimes it just gets a bit much.Like
I would really like to reach out and talk to someone but they are too busy telling me their troubles to
actually notice. But then I always seem to put accross to them that I am fine so it isn't really their fault
I also promised myself that I would avoid actually answering questions about the opposite sex,such as "is
there any hot boys in your class?"Then I was talking to my friend during the week and I found myself lieing
and being like yeah sure blah blah blah. I have led my friends to think I am staright and now I really want
to distance myself from that so my coming out wont be such a shock.
I am actually going to a gay bar soon which is something positive to be thinking about. My friends want to
see what it is like.With friends as cool about gayness as this I should just be able to come out and be
happy. Ah I wish I could just take a chance and do it.
I started a new job recently and there is a girl with a gay family member and all she does is make jokes
about her.I just wanted to tell her that she is an ass.She only talks about her to get attention and it
pisses me off.Speaking of work I guess I better end it there and head to bed,have a delightful day(I mean
that in a sarcastic voice) of work tomorrow.