My mom... Who took my sister and left... To Florida... From New Hampshire... Is a jerk.
No matter how many times I tell her that I don't want to move down there, she still pushes for it. Regardless of how I feel. She knows very well that I don't want to live in Florida, I made it freakishly clear.
It's not that I hate her. Or that I don't want to see her. But there are so many things here. I love my city, I love my house. I've walked around the block so many times I could do it backwards with my eyes closed. I, for the first time in my life, have friends who love me for who I am. They all live in New England. I'm in love and it's the most wonderful feeling ever. It's my life, and I have needs, and I'm not going to ruin everything I have that I worked so hard for because my mom lied.
Yeah, she lied. She tends to do that. Or mabye she just forgets. And if that's the case she has very convenient memory patterns.
This isn't the first time she's left to Florida, oh no. It's happened before, I went with her that time because that was before I had so many friends and my sense of adventure was calling me. but things happened and she moved back up here. You know what she said when she did? More than once? She said that if she left my dad again she'd stay in the area. She told me this many times.
Which is why the day when my parents were fighting and emotions were crazy, I said that I'd go with her if Shelby didn't. Because she SAID that she wouldn't move out of the area, and most certainly not all of the way to Florida and back to relying on her parents.
But, that's exactly what she did.
And that's not the only time she lied. She lied about other things too.
And she's said some awful things about my dad in court for the sake of forcing me to move somewhere I don't want to go.
And my dad dosen't deserve it. All he ever did was love and protect her. And when he needed comfort from her she didn't give it. And she couldn't communicate about things. My dad would break down emotionally because sometimes life really sucks and then my mom would beat him up because she couldn't deal with his emotional breakdowns. Because he just happens to be imperfect just like everyone else on this planet. So she took my sister and left all the way to Florida.
And then she complains because she hasn't seen me for months.
But I'm too kind to remind her that it's her fault.
And nobody forced her to move down there.
She claims that she tried to find a place up here. But I guess I don't matter enough to her because instead of trying harder she's trying to move me away from everything I love so I can live in a homophobic community and go to a public high school and be depressed for the next 3-4 years.
I'm terrified of public high school. (I'm home schooled.)
She KNOWS that.
She KNOWS how close I am with my friends.
She KNOWS that I'm finally starting to be comfortable with where I live, my plans for the future, and I have wonderful friends who are a second family to me.
And she still tries to convince me that Florida is better.
And she still tries to get the courts to force me to move there.
Against my will.
Because she can't face reality.
She dosen't realize that I'm not a little kid anymore. And it's my life and I want to live it happily.
She dosen't realize how unhappy I'd be living there.
Even though I've told her.
More than once.
But she dosen't care.
She rather move me away from all of this than try harder.
I wote an e-mail to her.
It's blunt, honest, and to the point.
I don't want to upset her.
But she needs to know.
It's too important for her to not know.
I haven't sent it yet...