i am so fucking bored, and frustrated and tired at the moment. my mum is in mackay, my dad is shacking up with his new girlfriend, whom i hate already even though i've never meet her, and my sister and i are constantly fighting. to top it all off, i've spent this entire weekend home alone. it is also very likely that i'll be spending monday, my day off, the exact same way. how did i become like this? i used to be able to do just fine by myself, but now i need people. i drink to make things go quicker, and so i don't have to put up with the mind numbing loneliness. i'm fighting with my family continuously, and i haven't seen my mum in about a month. i am missing my friends, and i have strong sexual feelings for one of my best friends. i pine for a career in the theatre, and i wish i could get out of this dead end fucker of a town and move to brisbane. i don't have a fucking clue what i'm going to do after year 12. i am at the starting point of coming out, and i plan to be an openly gay young man by the end of the year. i have extreme body issues, and i have complexes that people really hate me. i want to shout and scream, but i can't. so instead i sit at home, and i feel like shit.