came out! wow, that was werid

andyouwillknowmebythesoundofmyname's picture

It was kindof an accident, but at this point, these guys are going to find out one way or another.
Okay, these guys live across the hall from my dorm and they are not very GLBT friendly. It's not that they are hostile, but gay people are very often the but of their jokes, their not very funny jokes. Some of them have also been hitting on me, which I don't like very much at all, so I know I have to set them straight (ha!) sooner or later.
I have already told my roommates, and they have been wonderfull. They hardly know any gay people, but they have been great. They ask good questions, they are supportive, and they are trying to learn more.
There was a party here last night and everyone was here. There was a lot of drinking, and my grand plan was to announce that I am calling it a night, turn to my room, shout "I'm QUEER!!!" and then shut the door.
Things did not go as planned. People left before I got a chance to make my grand exit. I mentioned to my roommate that my wonderful plan had been dashed, she knows that I have been trying to get up the courage to tell the guys, and I didn't notice that one of them was still here.

So yeah... he knows now.

I told him that I am bi, but mostly gay, which is exactly how I feel right now. (Is it normal for bi people to feel completely gay sometimes and then just mostly gay other times?)
He was okay with it, but he asked a lot of really dumb questions.
"So when you look at a girl, do you look at them like guys do?"
"How do you know you are gay?" ...that one was easy to answer at least, I said "well, how do you know you are attracted to girls?" he seemed to understand that at least
He also didn't know anything about what lesbians do, and I didn't feel like enlightening him. I told him to look it up.

god, I hope it isn't this weird when I tell the others

but I want everyone to know because I am serious now
I really want a GF, and I don't want them to find out the wrong way, make a scene in front of someone I am trying to impress or something.


Can anyone give me some comming out advise for telling people like this who know practically no other gay people?


taste the rainbow's picture

I myself label myself as

I myself label myself as Bi/queer cuz' ya, I pretty much feel the same way you do, bisexual, yet feels closer to completely gay at times. However, are there times where you feel that you are leaning more towards completely straight? As for coming out advice, I don't got any!

"What they don't know can't hurt them

but it sure as hell can hurt me"

andyouwillknowmebythesoundofmyname's picture

not sure

I guess I had considered myself mostly straight for most of my life, but ever since I admitted to myself that I do like girls (just last semester), I haven't considered myself mostly striaght since.

It isn't consistent though.
The only clear thing that I can figure out is that when I have a crush on a guy, I feel exactly 50-50, and then when I have a crush on a girl I feel pretty much completely gay.
I'm not sure where that puts me.

I heard a rumor that bi is a choice, but you are born with gay.
I don't know what to think of this, but then when I think I am completely gay I assume that I must have always been this way, and then when I feel 50-50, I feel guilty, like somehow it's wrong for me to like girls AND boys.
Silly thing to think, especially because as far as I can tell it is just a rumor.

whateversexual_llama's picture

Yo. Be whateversexual! Then

Yo. Be whateversexual! Then you can love whoever you want whenever (not that I'm advocating cheating... I'm referring to genders lol)

But congrats on coming out. And no sexuality is a choice. It's a privelege.

Whatever I did, I didn't do it.

andyouwillknowmebythesoundofmyname's picture

that makes me happy!

This is why I love Oasis.
Plenty of support.
You guys make my day.

I don't think I could label myself whateversexual with these dudes across the hall though. They don't really even know the difference between Gay, Queer, Bi, or anything. Whateversexal would make things more confusing.

I decided to take a peek in the closet.
What a suprise to find myself hiding inside!

yesac's picture

I say, the dudes across your

I say, the dudes across your hall asked some dumb, but funny questions lol.
I'm Bi too. It's not wrong at all to like boys and girls. 50-50 is pretty normal, but it definitely can confuse you because both genders are so different.
I wish I had some better advice or things too say, but I'm really bad at this =P
I hope it all works out for you though =)