final GLM submission....

lookin to the future...'s picture

Screen name: lookin to the future...
Real name: jordin
Age: 17
State: washington
Gender: female
Bio: this poem is about my first girl. she lead me on for months and months and in the end completely denied her sexuality… it has been more than six months now and i still have a hard time waking up without her next to me.

*** and yes, i know it's long... very long for a poem but i thought it needed to be that long to really get my feelings across... also, even though this has now been submitted i would still love comments, suggestions... thanks guys!***

Shut Up. Just Feel

remember that night in idaho?
i wish i could give it back
to you
remember that night?
that first night?
of course you don’t
everything
just like that night
stop thinking about what you are doing
be obnoxious
ignore the stares
ask for the little kids menu
so we can play tic tac toe in the green and red crayons
but let me win this time
no inhibitions
go back to
singing
bad 80’s hits
at the top of your lungs
talk til 2 AM
or 3
4, 5, 6 maybe?
laugh
please laugh
i love your laugh
be who you are
really are

remember that day i told you the truth
about me?
but it was more about you
remember?
i want to give it back
to you
touch
be naïve
be obvious
dangerously obvious
cry
but let me hold you this time
take long walks
pick me flowers again
sunflowers are my favorite
tackle me to the ground
crawl in bed with me again
pull the covers over my head
but kiss me this time
get so close i can feel your heart beat
beat
beat again
spend the night with me one more time
let me wake up with your hair in my face
it smells so good
you smell so good
just one more time…

take me into the city on saturday morning one more time
take me down to the lake at night
remember?
you promised
you said you wanted to share it with no one else
please tell me you remember
call to say you miss me
i miss you too
take me to dinner
stare at me
when you don’t think i’m looking
i’m always looking
always
because you’re beautiful
did you hear that?
you’re beautiful

remember all those nights?
i wish
i want
i have
to give them back to you
i have to give back all the nights
because you aren’t yourself
because I waited
and waited
and waited
for you to just
shutupandfeel
the truth
that you can’t handle