i dont think i could've gone to sleep with a heavier heart than i did last night.
nor could i have woken up feeling more miserable than i did.
it just seems really fucking..gah. i can't even think of the words for it.
she led me on, all the signs, signals and compliments.
then turns around and says "you really need to go find a girlfriend. cause dude you and i would like never work." in a message.
let me get this straight.
things happen between us. kisses cuddles and random making out.
we've said we liked eachother. left it at that.
but lately. i dont know.
saying "you look hot the way you are" isnt really indirect.
and 9454305 other statements aren't really indirect.
led on much?
though i really shuold get over it.
go party. get drunk and high and completely out of this world.
sadly that's pretty much the only way i feel happy these days.
its fucking pathetic now that i think about it.
i gotta get out some.
home feels like a prison
school feels like a battlefield.
i want to meet people
people i can relate to. people that can relate to me.
people that i can around with and stare at the sky.
i dont even know anymore.