unlock the closet

electricity's picture

I really want to come out to 1) my mom, and 2) my three best friends. And soon. This weekend, maybe.

I've decided my mom will be getting a letter. She already knows I was questioning [I told her over summer] and I know she is absolutely going to be accepting. She always says "There isn't anything you could do that would make me stop loving you." Plus she's hella liberal and open-minded, and has this thought on homosexuality: "If love isn't wrong, then why is being gay?"

As for my friends... that's a little more difficult. It will have to be in person [I want to witness reaction and be pretty personal about it]. They are open-minded; we all watch Logo [gay channel] together and have talked about how being gay is as natural as being straight, etc. They are more comfortable with gay guys than girls, but that's probably because they're straight. Two of them have friendships/acquaintances with two guys, no girls. They've known a few lesbians [bisexuals] and thought they were nice and never had a problem with them etc.

But it's still a mystery as to how they'll take with me. We're close and I trust them immensely.

Now finding the right time to tell them. A time when it's just us, and when we're just chillin out, plenty of time on our hands. Ok.
Is there ever really a right time?


Riku's picture

If they're open minded like

If they're open minded like that then it should be fine. It's the right time whenever you feel ready. :) Good luck and go for it!

Lol-taire's picture

"There isn't anything you

"There isn't anything you could do that would make me stop loving you." = parent code for I know there's something you're not telling me

Your mum probably has a pretty good idea about you already. That said even though she is liberal and won't stop loving you, don't be put out if she's a tiny bit upset at first (even if she tries not to show it). Parents start planning our lives from the moment the little line turns blue. And even if they know our lives will turn out different to how they might have imagined, it's still strange for them.

Your friends I'm sure will be ok. But again, expect some stupid questions for a while and maybe a little distance intially. Once the novelty wears off everything will be back to normal.

Oh and no there is really rarely a right time. And normally when the perfect opportunity does arise, you get too tongue tied to do it properly.

Good luck! You'll be fine.

electricity's picture

parent code

hahah yeah the parent code thing is sooo true. The last time she said it was after we watched a program on Logo about 5 siblings who were a gay and a mom wondering "what did I do wrong?" And mom said : "I don't understand that. How can someone not love their kid for something like that?" And then followed up with the quote.

And since she already knows I've been questioning, she probably assumed. Plus, I have a deep love for Emily Haines [the amazing lead singer of Metric/ solo artist] and watch Logo all the time. There are clues.

I thank you for encouraging words =]

the ghost's picture


It sounds like things are looking good for your coming out!!I can't really say anything that hasn't been said already!Oh the only tip I can offer for coming out is to bring a pen incase you get tongue tied and can't say it.Then you will be able to write it down.Thats a handy tip some peeps on this site gave me when I was trying to tell my friend.Other than that good luck!Keep us posted!!

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent-Eleanor Roosevelt

electricity's picture

oh yes. In the scenarios I

oh yes. In the scenarios I keep replaying in my head, writing down has been an option. I thank you for the tip.