Can somebody please tell me why i put myself through this almost every week?? I love her so much, maybe that is why i torture myself like this. Almost every week we end up taking a break. i got used to it, i figured out a way to not think about it, but when your little sister is getting on your nerves making your life a living hell, and you have ACTs in three days, totally stressing like crazy, everything just comes out. I don't know what I should do. I love my girlfriend so much, but i don't know if i can handle all of these breaks. I just wish we could get through it without the two day breaks. This is killing me, but it would do more than break my heart, it would shatter it, if we didn't get back together. SLAP ME IN THE FACE, please. Maybe I'll stop crying, and do something. I just torture myself by wearing her necklace, her chain, her sweatshirt, her hat, and by hanging out with her, but i can't help it.
I miss her arms around me, her lips on my forhead, on my neck, her lips on my lips. I miss her smell, the twinkle in her eyes when she smiles. I miss the feeling of her staring at me when im' driving, pointing out every time i do "the nose thing" I miss it all, i miss her.
i can't stop crying now that i've started, but, i'm going to go pick her up, hold her hand, joke with her, turn away when i cry with her next to me, kiss her, and beg for her back. I don't know what is going to happen, but I need to see her.