Wishful Thinking

felicia's picture

It’s wishful
Thinking that you’re going to be with me
And we’ll be together forever
Which is a long time
To not really understand
The feeling within
Me and you is entirely impossible
To keep going on like this
Feelings are so hard to deal with
My love for you going one way
Off the road of our destinies
I look at you and think
Wishfully

I’m hoping
That love will save the day
As Celine and Whitney say
But what I need to express
Is what I’ve tried to put to rest
You touch is frightening
You voice exciting, igniting
What I’m trying to avoid
I’ve been running for so long
That I’ve forgotten my limits
I’ve been trying to out run it
And it’s only catching up to me
The fear is so inhibiting
The thoughts that we may never be
I cannot bear to think
And so I’m hoping

I’m praying
To whatever stands above me
To whatever has created me
And will one day take me away
I’m asking for an amendment
A correction, if you will
To the predestined, pre-willed
That says no to you and I
That fights my heart’s desires
My petty will unfulfilled
On my knees slowly chaffing
My heart and hands aching
From clamping so tightly
In praying

I’m loving
You, and me
But mostly you
And the idea of you
That I’ve fallen for
And chasing desperately
I’ve been half empty for too long
I need to turn it around
Take a page from the optimist book
And see a half filled look
Stop aching, stop praying
Stop hoping and wishing
Start doing, and saying
What’s been on my mind
Start loving
From me to you
And from you to me
Start loving

- written on April 27, 2007. These words are the residual feelings from 2 crushes left over that began with frendship, blossomed into butterflies-in-my-stomach-and-I-don't-know-what-to-do-with-myself-when-I'm-around-you-love, and then ended in friendship. Bummer.

Comments

-Ruby-'s picture

:-D wow

this is great writing felicia!