Can't take it much longer

peanut_gallery's picture

I've gotten so bitter, so cynical, so apathetic, and so burnt out. And I'm a freshman in high school.

Is this what I have to look forward to? Friends, but nobody to talk to. A group to belong to, but not be a part of. I have three more years of high school then god knows how many years of college. What do I have to look forward to? After I finish college, I go to grad school, then I get a job and let it suck out my soul (what's left of it).

I feel like I'm losing my soul to projects and tests and due dates. I have no life left in me. No enthusiasm. Nothing! I can't take this.

I'm just so, so tired. Not even physically tired, although there is that. I'm mind-tired, spirit-tired. I'm ready to drop and I'm the only one who knows it. Fuck!

I have 18 days until exams, and 23 days until school's out. I hope I can make it.

Comments

Duncan's picture

As a person who will be done

As a person who will be done high school in a matter of weeks, let me telll you that it does get better. Summer will reclaim your time. Yopu will hang with friends and work and in general, you will be happier. Trust me on this. *smile* You'll be done before you know it. :)

Courage is contagious... be strong, and soon you won't be standing alone.

Toph's picture

Really, friends and groups

Really, friends and groups aren't a thing to feel stressed over, especially at the end of the year. If they really are your friends, they'll stick by you. But every year you wave goodbye to one class only to greet another. There will be new people that'll probably be your new friends. New groups form as others disperse. I'm a senior (well I was until I graduated last week) and a lot of my friends are sophomores and freshman. So things work out, so don't worry about it.

~I love goodluck rubs ;P

joemondragon's picture

Wow, story of my life. I

Wow, story of my life. I think my weakness of spirit at the current moment comes from not being able to talk to anyone about my sexuality. I need to come out to someone before I leave for summer vacation.

"A friend is someone who bails you out of jail; a best friend is someone who stands in the cell next to you and says 'that was freakin' awesome'"
-Dr. Jamie Morris