Signs of Change

TheInsideLlama's picture

After about a year and a 1/4 of reluctance I've finally come out somewhere where I was a bit afraid to. I started out in an email because I called my friend we'll call him 'N' and asked if he would be at venturing (co-ed program by the bsa) {you can now laugh and point for me being a member of the bsa...} he was still upstate the other week and was going to mexico the next day so decided that I would just wait... wensday may 16th rolled around the night before I sent an email saying this may lead to further insight as to what I wanted to talk about. and to talk to his room mate/long time friend and attached this poem I found somewhere on the internet

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Do you know what it is to be an outsider

on the other side of the fence?
How alone you would feel, if excluded you were.
Does it make any sense?

Can you imagine the isolated soul
with no-one in sight to hear
the cries and the tears that your heart would shed,
and the constant, looming fear?

Can you see in your mind the life of a man
without anywhere to belong?
Because a society judged him unworthy,
because they think they're right, and he's wrong.

Try and imagine the pain that you'd feel,
with sneers and hateful words, and spit at your heels.
What would it be like if the gates were locked;
you couldn't get in, and you couldn't get out?

Imagine the feeling that you're worthless,
some dirt that's been stepped on by some one's uncaring shoe.
Perhaps at that point it's too much for your heart,
and you take your own life, to stop it hurting you.

Imagine this world, for maybe a minute,
after that you can stop; you don't like it, sure
but there are people who go through this every day,
and they can't stop it, unless they're no more.

So when you hear of hate, bigots and death,
don't side with haters, cause that's how you've been bred.
Imagine how it is, or was for that guy,
the one that's hurt, or lying dead.

So imagine the feelings and memories too,
of people oppressed, hated, abused;
Of people who lived outside of that fence
and what they came to - does it make sense?

---- By Unknown

When time comes for me to get out of school he called and i told him that I was gay and that I should really talk to "S" his room mate/ long time friend

and now it seems as if this has really helped my mom because she is really interested with having conversation about this with Mr . M (steve's dad/ Venturing associate advisor)

Don't know the exact outcome yet but hopefully this will help she seems willing at the moment to talk to someone she knows...


whateversexual_llama's picture

Great job starting to take

Great job starting to take those first steps. They're the hardest, but once you get past that it's all downhill. In a good way.

Keep chuggin, fellow Llama =P

Whatever I did, I didn't do it.

TheInsideLlama's picture

I've come out other places

I've come out other places but sometimes have had to go on big rants about what It truly means and everything... my mom will be having a sit down talk with Mr. M I have no clue when

Ginger's picture

just wanted to

just wanted to say:
venturing is the shit.

TheInsideLlama's picture

good shit or bad shit? I

good shit or bad shit? I know we the shit got a crew vs. crew stick ball game end of june...