Alive and well

Damon's picture

Jerry and I are alive and doing fine. Work has been busy since we are both full time now since school is out. Weekends are usually devoted to "mom things" or being with Jerry so the computer is sort of left to entertain itself with a Luny toons screen-saver of Sylvester Pussycat chasing little fishies underwater.

Jerry and I have found how easy it is to fool the general population of Casper if only we manage to stay our normal masculine selves. Everyone talks about the gay employee that works at the community as the guest manager and they talk about him to us as if we don't have a clue about funny.

Over the last weeks I have come to miss the private moments that Jerry and I had more of before school was out. Working full time sucks in that respect. I find myself silently lusting over his body as he whizzes by doing his duties or I fly by with two coffee pots in each hand.

By the time we are off we are both expected at home and weekends have been somewhat family oriented lately. Jerry does spend some time at my place on the weekend but it is usually under the watchful eye of the other members of my family and there is very little alone time.

I think it's time for a little weekend get-away for us. I am also a little sick of my boss. I was holding down the front desk so the secretary could take a break when a resident evedently fell outside. The lady who runs the little bank inside the community was leaving and she stumbled across the man bleeding on the steps just outside of my view. According to her she was screaming for someone to call 911 but she was doing that through two glass sliding doors outside the foyer. I didn't see her or hear her until she came inside and screamed to me to call 911. By that time it was decided that I didn't think the incident was important enough because I didn't respond until she came inside. Once I was aware, I immediately called 911 and stayed with them on the two-way radio until the paramedics arrived. Later my boss asked me if I was aware how important it was to respond immediately to such an incident. I was quite insulted that he would even ask that of me.

I have found the one thing that people can do to me that really sets me off is to insult my intelligence and my ability to care about important things such as that. I was quite put out that he thought it was even necessary to discuss the matter with me. I am a very capable and caring person and to have it suggested that I was not responsive enough has made me rather angry at my boss. It keeps rolling over and over in my mind of how I shoud have responded to his criticism but I am far too polite to say what I should have told him.

When something like that happens, it seems to me that the person discovering the accident should run to the nearest person with a phone and make them aware of the incident rather than standing by the fallen resident and screaming through two sliding interlock doors. But I ate the criticism and simply explained that I called 911 as soon as I was aware there was a problem. The boss left with a little phrase "OK Damon just so you know"

Pisses me off just thinking about it but since I already told him what my measures were I don't feel like it is worth opening the issue again with him. I am one of those people who is "blinded by the headlights" when I am accused of something that I didn't do but the thing that concerns me more than anything else is that the boss wasn't there that day so the criticism of my actions must have come from someone else.

I agree that perhaps he is just doing his job in questioning me but I have a problem when my integrity is challenged. It makes me angry to think that someone might have said that "Damon was just standing there with his finger up his nose while a resident was bleeding to death."

The man is fine and returned to the community after he got a few stitches in his forehead.

I am tired and the ten hours a day, four days a week are really taking a toll on my mood. My family is not used to retiring early and even though I can go jump in bed anytime I want, I find it hard to do when so much is going on in the house. Light under my bedroom door from the outside and little noises like the TV in Chucks room add to my thoughts of the day and keep me from going to sleep. Frankly, I'm wasted, nakered, and wish I could have some free time with Jerry.

Jerry hasn't decided what he will do next year while I finish my last year of school. I am afraid that this will take even a larger toll on our ability to spend time together. Maybe I should just get a job pumping gas somewhere.


TheInsideLlama's picture


Cool glad you found work, no luck for me there is the tech support job at one of the adviser's crew his union that he is president of is the tech support position is filled by his son steve, who I am both out to and helped my mom accept me (his son steve is gay) so it makes me feel good about that. Glad in a way you sitll have your closet mine has since long been demolised

Anonymous1's picture

Thanks so much for your

Thanks so much for your blogging. I have really enjoyed reading your blog. I hope that your troubles with rest and work find a way to a resolution for yourself. Maybe you're going to have to take a day off or something (something I find works well if things get desperate).

Anyways much of your blog has been really inspiring to me as I am coming to terms with my sexuality. Thanks so much.