So my first week of swim practice is almost over. And today, for some chlorine induced reason, I decided that I wanted to make it to districts in the 500 yrd event. For all you non-swimmers, 500's are the longest event in the high school swim meet. Nobody on my team will voluntarily swim this event. But me. The asthmatic. I swim the 500 in a little over 9 minutes. To get to districts, I have to swim it in...dun dun dun SIX. 6:40:8 to be exact. But I should have a faster time than that if I really want a chance. I have to drop 3 minutes off my times before...later October, early November. I'm perfectly capable, well, atleast I hope I am...And my coach thinks it's very possible. But cheese (like geez, only better), most people have to drop SECONDS off their times. I get to drop minutes. I WILL drop minutes. I dunno, for some reason, this is important to me. I'm not sure why. Maybe because it's my senior year and I want something more than just lettering in swimming for the third year. I want something to be proud of. Hopefully I can do it. So after a 2 hours swim practice, I have lifeguard training that lasts 4 more hours. I managed to injure the right side of my body 3 times in 4 hours. What gives?? First, I jammed my knee into the loop that the lane divider hooks into. My knee is twice it's usual swollen size and purple. I've got itty bitty knee caps and tendonitis and bursitis so my knees are usually a little bit swollen, but never this purple and this swollen. I was trying to pull a backboard out of the pool. And then, hours later, with a backboard AGAIN, I was treading water and I accidentally KICKED the pool wall. How I managed that, I have absolutly no idea. But I'm seeing this pattern with the backboards. I have bruises on the top of my foot and it feels funny when I curl my toes...I'm gunna catch crap from Shadowfrosty about this later, but oh well...I kinda...have a crush...on my dive coach and he's also my lifeguard instructor. Yes, he. I didn't leave off the "s". He's a teacher at my school and I feel so...cliched and...just yucky...But I dunno...I'm not sure if it's one of those admiration type infatuations, but it's just...weird...Because he and I are very comfortable with each other so we mess around and stuff...and he kinda flirts back...GAH! I can't believe I'm admitting this to anybody...Chlorine induced confessions. I'm telling you...there is some serious water in my brain or something...I mean....I'm supposed to be GAY. WTF?! And then, later, I twisted my finger in the vent on the bottom of the pool. I'm not usually this accident prone. Tomorrow, the seniors and juniors go in to take their school pictures. I'm kinda excited because I get to see all my friends that I didn't get the chance to hang out with over the summer. But, I also will be in the same room with my ex for the second time since we broke up. The first time was tramatic enough. And there have been more words spoken since then and I have a feeling that it will NOT be pretty. Whoa...I feel like I'm still in the pool...it's very weird...I need to get a hobby that isn't in the water. Back to the picture thing...I don't usually set off people's "gaydar" but I'm not girly either. I'm not sure if I want to wear more boyish clothes than girly or what. I'm a jeans and t-shirt type of girl...So I can't really decide. I want to look good...but I'm not sure whose attention I want...Because I can dress normal cute and get a little attention from everybody, dress girly and get attention from the boys...or dress like a boy and pray that somehow my school's gay population magickally grew. And if it was simple a matter of what I was comfortable in, I'd be fine, but everything is comfy...I hate being a girl. And btw: 6 days until she's here. Yes, I'm that excited.