jus plz read...

shewillbeloved's picture

a lot of times i wonder why am i this way? (why am i gay) an a lot of times i come with the conclusion that i was meant to be this way, and that i should be happy being like this..
but for some reason, i am happy at times but at others i feel so sad for being someone my family (well some of them) didn't want me to end up being..
and i know its harder to be gay than to be straight and i ain't exactly having an easy life right now and being gay doesn't really help the situation.
i feel like i have this empty space in my heart that needs to be filled, and friends just don't seem to take up that space- even family.. i know that to be happy and to enjoy being this way i have to find someone who really loves me and can show me that..
i've given love many times but i never received it in the way i need it (which is relationship wise) i've fallen for people way to many times and all i end up getting is a broken heart.. and the people that do really love me, that do really fall for me- are to far away to even work out..
and right now i really don't know what to do anymore..
and i don't know how much more times i can take getting hurt.


gaynow's picture

It's perfectly natural to

It's perfectly natural to feel crappy about being gay sometimes, because let's face it, being gay in todays world can just plain suck. You're right to say that you should be happy how you are, because nothing can change that. But it can be tough to feel like you're something your parents didn't really want you to be, and everyone wants love and acceptance, and you want it even more if you already feel out of place. So basically, all I'm saying is, I know what you're feeling, and so do most of the people on here, and it really fucking sucks. The only advice I can give you is, hang in there. You'll find someone eventually, and until then you've got all of us Oasisbians.

and Megan: "Cheers are supposed to be simple, make people feel good."
Graham: "Cheers make girls do stupid cartwheels. Orgasms make people feel good."
-But I'm a Cheerleader