Something turned off in my brain

underage_thinker's picture

I was remarking to myself the other day (what, other people don't talk to themselves, too?) that I'm never home alone at my dad's house. It always seems that there's someone I really hate there, wandering the many brightly lit hallways trying (and succeeding) to make my life hell. My shrink is out of town this week, so I'm free directly after school today and wednesday. My dad picked me up from school, picked up my sister, dropped off my sister at soccer practice, and dropped me off at home. Then my evil step-bitch showed up early because she forgot her bag for work, and left. My dad then left to go to ikea to get tables for the garage and then to pick up my sister from soccer practice. I know you needed to know all that, huh. Well, so now I'm ~finally~ alone at my dad's house. I've been sitting around on my fat lazy ass for almost and hour. Not fun....... It seems as though I do the things I normaly would do anyway, just without the mental breakdowns and crying jags- just kidding. That's the way it used to be, though. And then one time I took an anti-malarial pill and it made me hallucinate..... Yeah, not fun. Well, I used to hate going over to my dad's house, but now it's okay. Evil-step bitch has learned to LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!!!!! Yeah. And evil-step-sister has found her own "ness" in makeup, shopping, and lame-ass disney movies. My dad is a nice guy, kind of. I mean. I was looking through his computer history and found a website that was for people who couple-swap, kinda. It was a community thing where couples get together and have sex. I don't know. But when I found it, I was really surprised, because I was sure he was cheating on Evil step bitch and looked at porn. Neither of those were true. A little disconcerting, but I don't really care. So, on a completely different topic. I had the strangest experience yesterday. I don't really want to go into details, but.... What the hell, I'll go into details. ummm. So I was really really horny. And I started to masturbate, then a switch was flipped, adn I stopped wanting to. All the sexual desire left. It was really weird. I've stopped feeling anything sexual at all. It's so weird. I don't like it at all.....Soooooo Weirrrrrd. I'm kinda scared that I'm asexual. I mean, I still like girls in a kind of romantic sense, but not at all in a sexual sense. Or guys either, obviously. I'm kinda freaked out........

Comments

jeff's picture

Eh...

Not sure how not wanting to finish masturbating is any sign of chronic asexuality. Hmm, did you stop thinking of evil step-bitch, by chance? hehehehe

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Dreaming_Nevermore's picture

And there is happy-making in

And there is happy-making in the brain of Alice that she has awesome super-left wing parents who never annoy her with pointless crap. I'm sorry that your step-mom is such a bitch. Is she just evil because she wouldn't leave you alone, or is she evil for other reasons as well?

Or is she like the step-mother-bitch in That Stupid Movie I Was Dragged To Against My Will And Was One Of Three People In The Entire Fucking Theater Who Laughed During The Entire Thing (aka The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants).

All they can tell you is what they have seen and heard, in their time in this world, a third of it spent in sleep and dreaming, another third of it spent in telling lies. - Ursala K. Le Guin

underage_thinker's picture

Uuuuuuh. Or as the funny

Uuuuuuh. Or as the funny little preppy girls at my old school would say, "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWW..." Yeah, evil step-bitch is NOT, I repeat, NOT on my mind....... Okay, well, she's just evil because she gets all hyper and annoying and her daughter is a weird prep. Also, she and my dad don't get along so well, uh, dysfunctionatily much? I was in weird mode when the sisterhood of the traveling pants came out. I think I almost cried...... I cried a lot then. Yeah. My parents are Super- Left Wing as well, though. Well, my grandpa is radical left-wing, my dad is less so, and my mom less less so... I don't know. And I haven't been feeling anything... Anything sexuall at all and it's scaring me a bit.... It just dissolved. I don't know.....

underage_thinker's picture

Well, I guess I'm not

Well, I guess I'm not asexual, since it was there in the 1st place, but it's not now and it's starting to bug me.

Dreaming_Nevermore's picture

I've been having that since

I've been having that since for the past year. But I guess it's better than swinging between straight and gay, because the romantic thing for girls is a constant.

Until, that is, you have a 'fuck the world' phase and want to live alone as an old maid with loads of cats.

All they can tell you is what they have seen and heard, in their time in this world, a third of it spent in sleep and dreaming, another third of it spent in telling lies. - Ursala K. Le Guin

underage_thinker's picture

Heehee. I used to think I'd

Heehee. I used to think I'd end up as an old lonely cat lady..... I seriously did, I actually like the idea. It was one of two things I wanted to be when I grew up; an old cat lady or a gay man. not kidding... At all. And I definitely like girls.... Not an issue :-)