irrational

electricity's picture

I find myself terribly anxious with the fear of ghosts often these days. More so at night, of course. I find walking down my hallway difficult, like it was when I had yet to experience puberty. When I'd be near petrified and nervous at every noise and mind trick. I got over it, and I could watch Ghost Hunters and shows of the like without a problem. But for some reason, it all returned on halloween, as I talked about a couple of entries ago.

The Ghost Hunter Marathon was creepy, indeed. And now, whenever I'm walking down my hallway and entering the bathroom [that's the creepiest] in the dark all I can think about is the shit I saw/heard on those shows. I don't like it.

In digital photography I spend my time reading up on hauntings in various places [like Pike's Place Market in Seattle, my favorite place] and in my hometown, one of the most haunted places in Southern California. There, I'm not afraid. But it carries over to nightime and it's haunting, no pun intended.

I wonder what my fear relates back to, or why it ignited again. I wonder if I just never coped well enough with it, or if I'm some kind of a medium [haha] or what.

Let me know what you think, please. I'm keeping an open mind. It could be as simple as a silly childhood fear

Comments

Leisa's picture

wow

I have to say that you have just articulated my own fear. How did you do that?
It seems that I am afraid of lots of improbable things. For instance, its rather improbable that I will/would meet a ghost (or alien or serial killer or person with multiple personalities, other entities I find myself afraid of) but yet it's a source of intense fear for me. I'm not sure why or how it has come to be this way. Most people I know, friends family, are not afraid of these things, but rather, are afraid of things that are more probable, like getting in a car accident. So anyway, end ramble.

electricity's picture

Serial killers... I have a

Serial killers... I have a fear of someone breaking in to my house. Usually, I quiet the fear with shutting windows and locking all doors. Ghosts, for some reason, is such an intense fear. They're virtually harmless. Seeing one or hearing one would be so tramautizing for me. I've had small, probably explainable, ghostly enounters [always around Christmas] but nothing that would really freak me out.

Did you ever know what sparked your fear?

apuffalogic's picture

Huh.

I think'd it be cool to meet a ghost. Because--would it not prove the existence of some sort of afterlife?

"Politely rude. Briskly vague. Firmly uninformative"

5thstory's picture

Boo! My answer to your

Boo! My answer to your problems: take the worst, preferably most ridiculous, record you have, sit in the middle of the hall with all lights off, and play the record until you're laughing. It worked for me when I was a kid.

" . . . The sun does not shine upon this fair earth to meet frowning eyes, depend upon it." Charles Dickens

electricity's picture

I might give that a go. Or

I might give that a go. Or maybe something that puts me at ease? You think that would work?

5thstory's picture

As long as it creates a

As long as it creates a memory in there, it works. Just hold yourself to the hall, and as scared as you are it's bound to become boring to just sit in the hall for long...so you'll get over it.

" . . . The sun does not shine upon this fair earth to meet frowning eyes, depend upon it." Charles Dickens

Fiona Rosge's picture

i use to be like that now

i use to be like that now with ghosts but with spiders and needles. its like they'll go away and then it will spike up again. im not sure why either, but i mean you go over it right?um...was it a dream you were talking about in da beginning.
Fear is an odd thing.

Lol-taire's picture

OK so I definately don't

OK so I definately don't believe in ghosts, but oh god my fear of haunted swimming pools remains ridiculous.
I was swimming today and a woman got out of the jacuzzi just as I was lifting my face to breath and I see her out of the corner of my eye, with no glasses or contacts, seemingly appeared from no-where and I actually screamed.

Until recently I was frightened of various room in my house, or rather I'd get overcome with fear in various places in my house at certain times. The bathroom was one of them strangely enough.

When I was quite OCD it was worst because my mind would shoot out these waves of terror really often for no reason and I'd have to compensate with loads of equally irrational rituals. I eventually smashed a phrenology bust belonging to my mother because for years it gripped me with impossible fear. I could barely touch it to drop it. I've never been as frightened of an object. Even writing about it now is really difficult.

So I was technically actually a bit crazy from just before puberty until I was in my mid-teens, but you just have to get over it and tell yourself it's all from your own mind. Rationality over brain chemistry. Not even superstition, just brain chemistry.

electricity's picture

Oh yes the bathroom! Oh I

Oh yes the bathroom! Oh I hate watching ghost shows when things happen in the bathroom. That's my safe haven. I hate it when I have to be scared of peeing on anything besides the toilet.

No kidding. I know my mind is just exhaggerating images of what I've seen of ghosts [never first hand]. It'll take time, but my mind will replace those thoughts with pleasant ones. Like pretty girls and Kathy Griffin.