I havn't been on here in several months, i didn't really feel the need to write anything after coming out at camp, anyways, latly I've had this strange urge to come back to oasis, so here I am. Anyways, lots has happened
~I met another lesbian while at camp. We're just friends and will probably always just be friends because she lives so far away and she's not "my type" anyways, still, it's nice to have a gay friend.
~I finaly figured out how to put feeling into the harp so it's a lot more fun. Unfortunatly, when i have feeling I tend to sway and I don't follow the dynamics which pisses off my harp teacher. I don't like fighting with her cuz i love her so much, but i love playing the harp like this too. meh, o well.
~While at camp I got over the last bit of internalized homophobia that was still sitting around in the very back of my mind. yay for me!
~I went to a PFLAG picnic which was kinda fun, it was cool to see so many queer people in one place. It was the first time I had ever gone to something like that.
~I was in my school's production of peter pan. I was michael. It was sooooooooo much fun. I got to fly (one of the funest and most painful things I've ever done) and i got to keep the footy-pajamas which were my costum. They're the coolest things EVER; they're dark blue, have polar bears and snowflakes on them and say "arctic life". I'm kinda obsessed with them. The role was a lot of fun because i kinda act like a 4-yr-old anyways so all i had to do was walk on stage, be myself, fly, and then not get called imature but rather a good actor. lol, it was fun.
~yesterday was a big day; I finaly started coming out at school, something i've been meaning to do since about october or so. I came out to jesse, this person who asked people if i was gay behind my back which i was worried would make people think that i might actualy be gay. (this was the begining of last year) I got friends who I had already come out to, to convince everyone that i was really offened by what jesse had said. Anyways, I figured that if i told jesse this year that i was gay and wanted to be out, it'd be around the grade pretty quickly, so that's what i did. Also, if that doesn't work, we'll be having a unit on sexuality in health class so i'll definatly say something then.
~Also, yesterday, I got over stage fright. I had never really had stage fright till the end of last year when all of a sudden i got it real bad and screwed up performance after performance. (I only get it for solo stuff so the performance of peter pan was fine) Anyways, i worked really hard on it, I played in front of people almost everyday for the past 2 weeks or so, and it helped a lot. I also performed in my footy-pajamas from peter pan which made me feel like all i was supposed to be doing was having fun with the song instead of freaking out because I was in front of people. The result was the most fun I've ever had performing, and i did it in footy-pajamas!!!!!!!!!!!
~Currently I'm kinda pissed at my dad cuz he's still really insensitive about my sexuality. At dinner tonight he said that all gay men are really self-consious about their appearance. I can't mention my sexuality without him at least grimicing, it kinda sucks. But this time I wasn't so upset over it cuz I approve of myself and my sexuality enough now that i don't need other people's approval that badly.
So, yeah, that's my life in the past couple of months. Things have generaly been getting better. Did anyone actualy read this whole thing?